“2018.01.12 Cloudy turning overcast”
I finally walked to your side, in the name of a friend.
—Excerpted from Tao Shuran’s Diary
Becoming friends with the person one liked was a very wondrous thing.
It meant that the distance between two people drew infinitely close, but for Tao Shuran, becoming friends with Liang Yuanjing was a sweet torment.
Because to stay by Liang Yuanjing’s side, she could not let him discover even the slightest hint that she liked him.
The hot breath she exhaled condensed into a layer of mist on the floor-to-ceiling window.
Fang Qingyi pulled Zhao Zhengnian over to scribble their wishes on it. With Gaokao approaching, their heartfelt wishes were mostly related to the future.
Zhao Zhengnian wrote: Win first place in the competition and become the universe’s No.1.
Fang Qingyi wrote and erased repeatedly, finally vaguely writing: —In the same city as you.
Zhao Zhengnian asked, “Who are you referring to?”
She did not answer that question.
Instead, Tao Shuran stared at the line they wrote for a moment. Liang Yuanjing casually asked, “Do you want to write something?”
Unexpectedly, Tao Shuran shook her head and said with some distress, “I don’t have any wishes.”
Zhao Zhengnian grinned and leaned over. “Then, Tao Meimei, what is your dream?”
Tao Shuran hesitated and said, “Study hard and get into Qing University?”
“Pfft hahaha.” Zhao Zhengnian threw his head back and laughed. “What kind of dream is that? I’ve outgrown that stock answer since elementary school.”
Tao Shuran lowered her head bashfully, her round eyes flickering with a moment of bewildered uncertainty.
She truly did not know where her future path lay, nor had anyone ever asked her that question.
At home, Zhao Yanyun hoped she would become a lawyer in the future, while Tao Hongfeng thought the legal profession involved too much overtime and that it would be better to study a local normal school program and become an elementary school teacher, with winter and summer vacations to boot.
But what did she herself like?
Tao Shuran did not know. She had always been searching, hoping to find a lifelong passion like Liang Yuanjing’s love for flying, yet she had never found it.
The familiar wave of anxiety swept over her again.
Liang Yuanjing glanced over and saw the girl’s face scrunched up like a little steamed bun.
He lifted his chin slightly and casually bailed her out.
“She’s only seventeen. Why force her to come up with a dream? Life isn’t set in stone here for a lifetime.”
Fang Qingyi agreed. “Exactly, exactly. I haven’t even figured out what I want to do in the future.”
The snow fell heavier and heavier, almost covering the grayish-blue eaves.
The planned sleep time kept getting pushed back; no one wanted to go to bed first.
In truth, there was nothing particularly special that happened that night—just a few kids who had quarreled with their families running out to gather together and chat about meaningless things.
Later, when Tao Shuran looked back on that day in her recollections, amid the passage of time, she gradually savored the unique youthful flavor belonging to that day.
She remembered vividly what Fang Qingyi had leaned over to say that night.
With red eyes, Fang Qingyi said, “Tonight is the boldest thing I’ve ever done—climbing over the wall from home in the middle of the night, just to see him tomorrow morning.”
“If he’s unhappy, I immediately want to rush to his side.”
The undertone of secret love was bravery.
Tao Shuran sat cross-legged and looked up at the unobstructed night sky, the glass reflecting the figure of the person she liked.
Even just catching a glimpse of him filled her heart with joy.
That joy swept away all the fatigue from staying up all night.
In the midst of utter silence, under the wind and snow, Tao Shuran’s raised finger trembled slightly as she quietly wrote her secret.
“May he be safe and successful, soaring straight to the clouds.”
At exactly eight in the morning, the four of them had agreed to go to the hospital together to visit Grandpa Fu Changpei and see if there was anything they could help with.
Tao Shuran got up half an hour early, planning to go home to freshen up.
In the latter half of the night, she had gotten a bit too tired and did not know when she had fallen asleep leaning on the sofa. When she woke, Fang Qingyi was using her leg as a pillow, and a cashmere blanket was draped over her.
As soon as Zhao Zhengnian woke up, he started clamoring that he was hungry. Fang Qingyi, annoyed by his noise, dragged him to a breakfast shop across the street.
“Boss, please pack two more bowls of porridge separately, ten fried dumplings—the porridge should be light, and pack the small menu item alone.”
Zhao Zhengnian chuckled. “Miss Fang, I never noticed you were so good at taking care of people.”
That casual tease unexpectedly made Fang Qingyi bristle like a cat whose tail had been stepped on.
She hurriedly fished out some change from her pocket, avoiding his gaze while yelling that if he did not want to eat, he could get lost.
Zhao Zhengnian suddenly realized something. His face paled sharply, and the fried dumpling on his chopsticks dropped with a loud clatter.
But Fang Qingyi’s mind was not on him at all.
She walked to the shop entrance and tugged at Tao Shuran, who was peering out. “Ranran, what are you looking at?”
“That auntie…” Tao Shuran withdrew her gaze and softly asked, “Is that Liang Yuanjing’s mom?”
“Let me see.”
Fang Qingyi stood on tiptoe and looked far into the distance. She was not very familiar with Liang Yuanjing’s mother either.
She only knew her name was Li Wan, a famous investor for Affiliated Middle School. Rumor had it that she had funded the construction of a building at the school.
But she was very busy and never attended any school events related to Liang Yuanjing. Even in the crucial third year of high school, she had never appeared at parent-teacher meetings called by the teachers.
“Seems like it.” Fang Qingyi said in a tone of relief after a close call. “Good thing we didn’t run into his mom. I heard she doesn’t like Liang Yuanjing hanging out with girls.”
Tao Shuran was about to ask why when she saw a green taxi pull up at the end of the street.
A familiar figure appeared at the alley mouth. She called out “Mom” and hurriedly ran over.
Zhao Yanyun stopped in her tracks. Exhaustion from a night of rushing about was evident on her face, but upon seeing Tao Shuran, she managed a smile.
She warmly asked, “You came downstairs for breakfast?”
Tao Shuran hummed in response and glanced behind her, not seeing anyone. A bit uneasily, she asked, “Where’s Dad?”
“Oh, he went to the market to buy ribs for you, said he’d stew soup for lunch.”
Zhao Yanyun paused, then continued, “Don’t worry. Right now, your Gaokao is the most important thing in our family. At least until your Gaokao is over, Mom and Dad will stay together.”
“But Mom still hopes you’ll listen to my advice and study law.”
“But
I’m not interested in law, nor do I like the work of a lawyer very much.”
Tao Shuran lowered her eyes and said softly, “You can’t force yourself to do things you don’t like, just like you and Dad. If you really feel life together isn’t suitable, you can separate. Don’t compromise because of me.”
“Don’t overthink it. Your Gaokao is the biggest thing right now.”
The obedient and sensible daughter suddenly retorted, and Zhao Yanyun frowned, her tone turning stern.
“If not a lawyer, what do you think you can do? Do you think jobs in society have no thresholds?”
For a long time, the choice of major had been the conflict standing between Tao Shuran and Zhao Yanyun.
She had never clearly expressed her own thoughts, also because deep down she subconsciously feared clashing with Zhao Yanyun.
But this day would always come, wouldn’t it?
Just like what Liang Yuanjing had told her—people could not force themselves to choose something they did not like just because they feared arguments.
That would be too much of a grievance for oneself.
Thinking of this, Tao Shuran slowly lifted her head and asked softly, “Mom, am I really that bad?”
“Bad enough that you think I can’t excel in whatever major I choose.”
Zhao Yanyun said coldly, “If you’re not bad, get into the top twenty in the next mock exam and show me.”
Tao Shuran’s eyelashes trembled, her voice carrying a hint of teary moisture.
She asked Zhao Yanyun, “Do you also never believe I can get into Qing University?”
Zhao Yanyun said, “Don’t you know your own abilities?”
It was like a beautiful dream being torn to shreds.
Tao Shuran trembled all over.
That sentence brought her back to a few months earlier, when Fuqing City had just entered autumn and the weather had not yet turned this cold.
That evening had been her turn for classroom duty. Wen Fangfang and her group had blocked her in the bathroom, throwing down piles of photos and cursing her with the most vicious words.
They called her a toad lusting after swan’s meat, overreaching for things that did not belong to her.
For Zhao Yanyun, was her goal of getting into Qing University also a pipe dream?
Tao Shuran’s breathing grew labored, her tear-filled eyes unable to help but look across.
Zhongshan Mansion and West Kang Road faced each other from afar, separated by a century-old avenue lined with sycamores, like a galaxy weaving through, becoming an uncrossable chasm for her.
Liang Yuanjing.
Every step closer to you was actually so difficult.
Tao Shuran slowly walked home and opened her diary. The thin diary was unknowingly already more than half-filled.
Flipping back to the first page, Tao Shuran saw her class ranking climb step by step from the bottom to the top fifty in the grade.
She bit her lower lip tightly, vowing to work even harder every day.
On the other side, Liang Yuanjing had just taken a shower. When he came out, he happened to see Li Wan walking in.
He froze, his gaze falling on the mess in the living room that had not been cleaned up—empty cans scattered by the coffee table, along with snack wrappers.
“I called Auntie Yao to come clean up later.”
Liang Yuanjing glanced at the time and said stiffly, “My friend’s grandpa is sick. I need to head out to visit him.”
Li Wan questioned coldly, “Liang Yuanjing, did you bring a girl home yesterday?”
“They’re friends.”
He pressed his tongue against his cheek, impatience flashing across his face, but he still held his temper and asked, “Can’t I have female friends?”
Li Wan stared fixedly at his face. In that instant, Liang Yuanjing even felt like she was not looking at him, but at some enemy etched into her bones.
No child could accept their mother looking at them with such eyes.
Liang Yuanjing was momentarily stunned. In that daze, Li Wan’s expression of loathing appeared before him.
Her voice was filled with disgust as she said, “You don’t deserve it.”
Liang Yuanjing’s throat bobbed, his chest burning like fire, the pain shocking. His straight lips pressed into a sharp line.
He said nothing, his face deceptively calm, but the artery in his neck throbbed violently, his hands clenched into fists at his sides, fingertips trembling slightly in the unseen corner.
After a few seconds, he pretended as if nothing had happened, hooked a cynical smile, grabbed his jacket, and headed out.
Without looking back, he dropped a sentence as he passed. “Fine, I’ll move out starting today so I won’t be an eyesore to you anymore.”
…
At the same time, Tao Shuran was also very sad—one part over her own mediocre aptitude, the other over Zhao Yanyun’s attitude.
These adults never considered the children’s feelings. In the face of what was “suitable,” was her liking for him not important at all?
Fuqing City had entered wintertime; the lush sycamore tree downstairs had shed its leaves, leaving only bare trunks pruned into a Y-shape.
The noisy summer cicadas were gone. Tao Shuran lowered her head in a daze and felt, on one tree trunk, the trailing note of youth about to pass.
Distraught, she closed the window, trying to shut out all outside noise.
But in the instant she closed it, a small paper ball hit the third-floor window, and at the same time, the phone on the bed rang.
She instinctively looked downstairs and saw Liang Yuanjing under the brilliant dawn glow, one hand holding his schoolbag, leaning lazily against the wall.
He deliberately stood in the shadows, but the light still slanted down, outlining a side profile with superior lines.
Aloof, proud, yet full of human warmth.
“Get out here.”
Staring at his message, Tao Shuran could not help but smile.
All unpleasantness vanished in an instant.
Grandpa Fu Changpei was hospitalized at Municipal First Hospital, some distance from Linchuan District.
The four of them took a cab together. Liang Yuanjing had gotten the ward number in advance. Fu Changpei was always overly polite, courteously saying they did not need to come and that he feared disturbing their precious study time.
Liang Yuanjing lifted an eyebrow impatiently. “Send the location.”
Fu Changpei’s mother was temporarily out of town on business. At home, aside from his grandparents, he was the only one left, and he had been running back and forth at the hospital all night.
When Tao Shuran and the others saw him, they felt he looked much more haggard.
Liang Yuanjing unscrewed a bottle cap and handed him a bottle of water, asking about the specific situation.
“He was still in the ICU, not awake yet. The doctor said to check the specific situation after he woke up.”
Fu Changpei said with some self-blame, “I’ve lived with Grandpa for so long, yet I never noticed he was unwell.”
“It’s not your fault.” Liang Yuanjing patted his shoulder. “Go back, change clothes, and rest. I’ll watch for you in the morning; I’ll notify you if anything happens.”
Fu Changpei hesitated at first, but then Tao Shuran chimed in from behind to persuade him, saying she would notify him immediately if there was any news. Human energy was always limited; he could not stay awake twenty-four hours a day.
“If you need anything, just tell me.”
As he left, Liang Yuanjing walked him a short way and instructed, “I’ve sent you the number for the driver at home. If Grandpa Fu needs any rides, just let him know; I’ve already given them a heads-up.”
Tao Shuran stood with him at the door.
Upon hearing this, she could not help turning her head slightly to glance at Liang Yuanjing. She had not expected him to be even more thoughtful and considerate than she had imagined.
Fu Changpei said softly, “Thanks.”
His thin, straight shoulders stood firm and unmoving in the biting cold wind. A pair of cold, clear black eyes held no emotion, making him appear incredibly strong.
But both Tao Shuran and Liang Yuanjing could see his vulnerability.
Being reserved did not mean lacking emotions; sometimes, suppression was the deepest form of turmoil.
“If you really want to say thanks—”
Liang Yuanjing shoved his hands in his pockets, his eyelashes lowered as he smiled casually.
“I got kicked out by my family. Can you take me in for a bit?”
Liang Yuanjing had been kicked out of his home? Was it because of what happened between them last night?
Before she could dwell on it, Tao Shuran turned her head in disbelief to look at him. Beneath the somber white wall, Liang Yuanjing’s expression was indifferent, lost in his own thoughts.
Fu Changpei reacted first and said hesitantly, “My place… Will you be able to get used to it?”
“You and Tao Shuran both live there. What wouldn’t I be used to?”
“The Gaokao is just a few days away. I plan to tutor her intensively.”
Liang Yuanjing’s gaze fell frankly on her face. His fine black eyelashes fluttered slightly, drawing special attention to the small black mole at the corner of his eye, which was utterly captivating.
His voice was hoarse too, sounding like a tease in the ears of someone like Tao Shuran who was paying close attention.
“Once you promise, you can’t back out, right?”
“Qing University is waiting for you two.”