“2018.10.04 Cloudy”
Love made the brave hesitate and the timid brave.
—Excerpt from Tao Shuran’s Diary
After returning home for National Day, Fang Qingyi came to Tao Shuran’s house to hang out. She sat cross-legged on the sofa, cracking sunflower seeds.
She cracked them while feeling frustrated that Tao Shuran wasn’t living up to her potential.
“Be proactive, Tao Shuran.”
Fang Qingyi tsked. “Without being proactive, where would love come from? Now that you have the right status, the person closest to the river gets the moon first, you know?”
“But the moon can’t be caught.” Tao Shuran said softly. “According to cosmic distances, no matter how close the tower is, you can’t grab it.”
“Nothing on earth is too difficult if one sets one’s mind to it.”
Fang Qingyi picked up her phone and started typing away, turning back to ask her as she did. “Liang Yuanjing’s birthday is in November. I’ll take the initiative to organize a gathering. Will you step up?”
After hesitating, Tao Shuran softly said, “Mm.”
She asked again, “What do you think I should give him as a gift?”
Fang Qingyi said, “What kind do you want it to be?”
Tao Shuran thought for a moment and answered very seriously, “Something he would really like, but that wouldn’t give away that I like him.”
“A fountain pen?”
“A suit?”
“How about an airplane model?”
A string of suggestions followed, but Tao Shuran kept shaking her head. She always felt they were missing something. Luxurious gifts meant nothing to him.
Her selfish wish was for something that could truly stay by his side.
Even if they parted ways later, this gift could stand in for her and remain at his side.
Fang Qingyi thought for a while but then refused to think anymore. She lay on the sofa watching TV dramas. The air was gradually taking on the chill of late autumn and early winter.
She shrank her neck, then suddenly had a flash of inspiration.
“How about a scarf? Ranran, if you knit one yourself, it would definitely be meaningful.”
“And if you don’t tell him, he definitely won’t know you knitted it. Scarves are a winter essential—practical and valuable.”
Tao Shuran’s heart stirred. She picked up her phone and started searching for scarf-knitting tutorials.
She added a bunch of tools and materials to her cart, even specially buying the softest cashmere yarn, despite the comments saying cashmere yarn was hard to knit.
But since it was for Liang Yuanjing, she always wanted it to be the best.
Fang Qingyi watched her series of actions from the side and spoke up a bit sourly. “I’m so jealous, Ranran. How come no one knits a scarf for me?”
Tao Shuran caught the implication in her words and smiled lightly at her. “What color do you like? I’ll knit one for you too.”
Fang Qingyi was overjoyed and raised her arms in cheer.
“Yay! I want one that’s multicolored and vibrant.”
During the seven-day National Day holiday, Tao Shuran really didn’t go out much. She shut herself in her room studying scarf-knitting tutorials.
Handicrafts tested one’s patience. After knitting two rows and getting a rough shape, she realized she had dropped two stitches in the first row, so everything after was off.
With no other choice, Tao Shuran unraveled the whole thing and started over.
A day passed. Her eyes burned, and the floor was littered with tangled balls of yarn. She rubbed her eyes and continued following the tutorial.
Someone gently knocked on the door.
While she panicked and hid the scarf, Tao Hongfeng came in with a plate of cut fruit.
“Ranran, what’s this?”
Tao Hongfeng picked up a piece of the half-finished work from under the pillow, amused yet exasperated.
“What is this supposed to be? A scarf?”
“The first year of college when your mom and I started dating, she seemed to knit something like this for me.”
At that point, Tao Hongfeng paused.
He set down the fruit plate and looked at her hesitantly, even choosing his words carefully.
“Ranran, have you found a boy you like at school?”
“No, I’m just trying it out.” Tao Shuran hurriedly took the yarn from her dad’s hand and explained offhandedly, “The practical skills teacher in remedial class complains our hands aren’t steady enough or our hearts meticulous enough.”
“So I wanted to try some handicrafts to practice dexterity.”
“Actually, dating isn’t a big deal.” Tao Hongfeng shrugged. “Your mom and I were college classmates. Campus romance is pretty wonderful.”
Tao Shuran asked curiously, “How wonderful?”
A nostalgic look appeared on Tao Hongfeng’s face. “After class, I’d pick her up. We’d wander the snack street near school for an entire afternoon. In the evening, we’d hold hands and stroll the sports field. One time under continuous moonlight, I couldn’t hold back and kissed her forehead.”
“Between you and Mom, who confessed first?”
“Of course it was…” Tao Hongfeng cut himself off, turning his head away embarrassed and pretending to scold her. “You little rascal, prying into our business.”
Tao Shuran stuck out her tongue, secretly relieved in her heart that she’d successfully changed the subject.
Rushing through it, by the time November arrived, Tao Shuran finally knitted a decent scarf.
As an accent, that weekend she dragged Fang Qingyi with her to a gold shop in the mall near school to buy a small accessory.
At checkout, Fang Qingyi smacked her lips. “Big spender, Tao Shuran.”
“You’ve pretty much blown your scholarship for this semester, right?”
Tao Shuran smiled. “As long as he likes it.”
She sat down in a coffee shop and, while waiting for her coffee, fixed the pendant to the scarf.
She had chosen wine-red cashmere yarn for the scarf. The moment she saw the color, she felt it suited Liang Yuanjing perfectly.
For the accessory, she picked a planet pendant with a star. The shop assistant said it was Mercury. Tao Shuran tilted her head and stared at it for a while but couldn’t see any features indicating it was Mercury. Still, she accepted the description.
As she threaded the needle, Fang Qingyi suggested, “How about sewing your name on the side?”
“That would be so romantic— the person you like wearing a scarf you made by hand, with your name close to his heart.”
For an instant, Tao Shuran was tempted by her description.
Soon, she suppressed it and shook her head.
“That would be too obvious.”
“Obvious how? Embroider an R and say it’s the brand name. Guys won’t care about that stuff.”
Tao Shuran said, “Then I’ll try?”
Five minutes later, she pressed her lips together.
She had overestimated her skills. Staring at the crooked, looped letter R on the scarf, Tao Shuran held her faintly aching forehead.
She turned her head for help. “What do I do?”
With the appointed time approaching, Fang Qingyi decisively pulled her away.
“That’s just brand design. Anyway, if you don’t admit it, Liang Yuanjing would never think you embroidered it yourself.”
Liang Yuanjing’s birthday was on the day of Lidong.
A person as dazzling and bright as flame was actually born on a biting early winter day.
Tao Shuran still remembered his birthday last year at Affiliated Middle School. Conditions had been very simple then, but to give him a proper birthday, she had put in tremendous effort.
Back then, they weren’t even friends.
A year later, she had become his nominal girlfriend.
It was as if God’s script was always inscrutable. Tao Shuran didn’t know exactly what step she and Liang Yuanjing had reached.
She was probably very close to the moon now, but the moon was the moon. No matter how hard she tiptoed, she couldn’t pick it.
The moon didn’t even know it was the moon.
At that thought, a bitter smile tugged at her lips.
She pushed open the door to the private room and went in. As expected, there were already many people inside.
Liang Yuanjing had lots of friends. All the ones she could name were there, plus a bunch she’d never seen, filling the entire room.
He was surrounded in the center like a star held by the moon, as if he was born to be the protagonist.
Tao Shuran wasn’t used to the atmosphere and planned to shrink into a corner like a turtle. Before she could walk over, Liang Yuanjing spotted her at a glance.
He immediately set down his cards, pulled out a chair, and walked toward her.
“Hey! Why’d A Jing drop his cards mid-game?”
“Yeah, I was about to win…” Zhao Zhengnian had a lollipop in his mouth. As he spoke, his gaze followed.
He suddenly shouted exaggeratedly, “Oh, it’s our Tao Meimei who’s arrived.”
“Sister-in-law!”
The thunderous “Sister-in-law!” startled Tao Shuran. Her whole body trembled involuntarily, her eyes widening slightly.
She wanted nothing more than to run away on the spot.
But halfway there, Liang Yuanjing caught her and dragged her back.
With a long arm, he reached out and pulled the hat off her head. Seeing her fair, pink face, a slight smile appeared on his face.
He teased, “Classmate Tao Shuran, no invitation? Dressing so ghostily and sneaky.”
Tao Shuran touched her earlobe and looked up at him seriously. “Do we really need an invitation?”
Fang Qingyi hadn’t mentioned this when they came.
It was probably some special rule in their circle.
Tao Shuran’s lashes drooped, her gaze dimming.
Liang Yuanjing lowered his head to examine her expression, drawing out his tone as he said, “Yeah.” It was obviously playful.
He paused, then lifted her hat and put it back on. He crossed his arms, leaned close to her ear, and whispered lowly—
“But girlfriends get VIP no-invite privileges.”
The pulled-down hat blocked her view, making the low male voice by her ear even clearer.
A thin layer of heat rose on Tao Shuran’s face. Her lashes brushed the dry fabric, her heart racing.
She felt like he was right there beside her.
The room had the AC on, and the air was somewhat stuffy and hot. Tao Shuran slowly unzipped her jacket, her face flushing from the breeze.
Liang Yuanjing glanced over, reached out with a fingertip to check the temperature at her neck, and said considerately, “Are you hot?”
Tao Shuran said, “Mm,” and slowly took off her coat.
Liang Yuanjing had been standing by waiting. He naturally reached out, took the coat she removed, and draped it over his arm.
It was as familiar as if the two of them had been dating for a long time.
Tao Shuran bit her lower lip tightly, forcing herself not to focus on the details.
But the heart of someone secretly in love was like a magnifying glass amplifying everything several times. His every move played out like a movie in her pupils.
“Sit here.”
Liang Yuanjing pressed her into his original seat, a smile hooking his lips. In a somewhat casual tone, he lifted his chin toward the others at the card table and instructed—
“Take care of her, guys. She’s a girl.”
Unexpectedly sat at the main table, Tao Shuran wanted to stand up, but the hands on her shoulders pressed down heavily.
She looked up uneasily and said awkwardly, “Liang Yuanjing, I don’t really know how to play this.”
“It’s nothing, just treat it like a game.”
Liang Yuanjing took a lighter from his pocket and prepared to head out.
“I’m going out for a smoke.”
Tao Shuran grabbed the hem of his clothes as he turned to leave. Liang Yuanjing thought she wasn’t used to being there alone and was about to reassure her.
But he saw her water-like eyes blink, her clear pupils gazing at him.
She asked softly, “When did you learn to smoke?”
Liang Yuanjing’s heart skipped a beat.
His gaze naturally lingered on her face for a moment.
Soon, he chuckled lightly and looked at her in a joking tone. “I’ll tell you after you win this round.”
Tao Shuran said, “Mm.”
Her seriousness actually added some fun to the somewhat boring game.
It made Liang Yuanjing, outside, keep thinking about her absentmindedly.
When he came back in, the atmosphere had heated up to another level.
Liang Yuanjing raised a brow, hand in pocket, and strolled over leisurely. Amid the intense card-playing sounds, Tao Shuran, clutching a huge hand of cards, clearly didn’t fit in.
She looked very nervous, staring intently ahead. Having lost too many rounds, her forehead was covered in penalty slips of paper.
Seeing the scene, Liang Yuanjing couldn’t help but chuckle lowly.
He bent down, flicked the dangling slips with a fingertip, his smile roguish.
“How are you so pitiful?”
Tao Shuran seemed to see her savior. She puffed her cheeks, a bit aggrieved as she complained to him.
“They’re all too good. I can’t beat them.”
“Is that so?” Liang Yuanjing drawled,
echoing her.
“Weren’t you supposed to take care of her? Is this how you take care of people for me?”
His tone carried a flavor of calling them out, overly indulgent favoritism that instead made Tao Shuran embarrassed.
She tugged his sleeve and explained softly, “Everyone’s already let me win lots of times. It’s me who doesn’t get it.”
Liang Yuanjing pinched a slip with two fingers, half-bent at the waist, meeting her clear eyes.
A hint of amusement rose in his eyes as he teased her on purpose.
“Want me to help you?”
“Make me happy, and I’ll help you win.”
Suddenly, at such a close distance, the hanging note limited her vision, narrowing it to the tiny world lifted by the fingertips of Liang Yuanjing.
Tao Shuran blinked, her pupils completely filled by his face.
What moved her heart even more was that, at such a close distance, she also saw herself completely reflected in Liang Yuanjing’s eyes.
How… to coax him?
She had absolutely no experience with this.
Tao Shuran turned her head away, her pleading gaze frantically sweeping toward Fang Qingyi.
Receiving her signal, Fang Qingyi immediately dropped the game console in her hand, propped herself up on the sofa, and desperately mouthed words to her by pointing at her own mouth.
Before she could make out what she said, Tao Shuran was pinched on the chin and turned back.
Liang Yuanjing crossed his arms over his chest and looked at her with a smiling expression, his threatening tone sounding very genuine.
“Think of it yourself.”
“Otherwise, it doesn’t count.”
Tao Shuran puffed out her cheeks again. Her lowered gaze flickered with the impulse to lift for an instant, but it timidly fled upon touching his smiling eyes.
Her heart leaped and swayed in that moment, the lingering warm touch on her chin feeling just like a dream.
Her mind quickly recalled the lessons Fang Qingyi had given her before. Shameful scenarios and lines flooded in all at once, causing Tao Shuran’s body temperature to spike.
She felt a cluster of fire igniting in her heart.
“Liang Yuanjing.”
Tao Shuran squeezed her eyes shut, took a deep breath, and struck a desperate pose.
She clasped her hands together, blinked her eyes in a begging gesture, and said to him very sincerely:
“Please help me.”
Looking at her, Liang Yuanjing’s mind conjured up the beckoning cat statue at the supermarket entrance—the one with a world-weary, reluctant expression, nodding and shaking its head while saying “Welcome.”
Tao Shuran’s current awkward cuteness resembled it perfectly.
Liang Yuanjing couldn’t hold back and burst out with a puchi laugh.
After laughing, he felt a bit embarrassed. He curved his finger against his lips and mumbled an “Mm.”
Did this count as passing?
After all, it was her first time. Tao Shuran cleared her throat and looked up at him with a touch of anticipation.
Receiving her gaze, Liang Yuanjing raised an eyebrow. He shifted the finger against his lips forward to bite it, as if holding something back.
After a moment, his low but clearly amused voice fell by her ear.
“Reciting it like a textbook—you don’t know how to act spoiled at all?”