He covered his face with his left hand and took a deep breath. He wanted to steady his breathing, but instead, he inhaled a nose full of that catnip scent.
He felt drunk again.
“Jiang Ying.”
Su Heng unconsciously murmured her name, his body trembling along with the word. The simple two syllables felt astringent on his tongue, as if he might accidentally bite it. As he spoke, a secret sense of satisfaction rapidly spread through his chest, tepid and cool, like her breath and body heat were invading every part of him.
He didn’t even dare to say her name a second time.
As he changed his clothes, he almost felt like she was right there, watching him, leaning back against the sliding door of his wardrobe, her usually empty eyes sparkling.
He knew it was a hallucination. He squeezed his eyes shut forcefully, and sure enough, she vanished.
Going to the kitchen for water, he saw the food she’d covered with plastic wrap in the fridge. Again, the image appeared before his eyes: her flustered, rushing against the clock before work to prepare this for him. He took the plate out and put it in the microwave to heat.
It wasn’t particularly delicious, but it was very healthy. Clearly, she had prepared it specially for him.
“Is it good?”
He saw her sitting at the table, chin propped on her hands, “gazing” at him. Being watched so intently while eating should have been unpleasant, but Su Heng felt a sweetness in his heart. Even though she couldn’t actually see him eating, even though the her beside him right now was purely an illusion.
He silently scooped up a large spoonful of congee, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallowed.
She reached out and stroked his Beast Ears, saying, “So good, eat more, Good Dog.”
Su Heng withdrew his gaze from the empty seat, his pupils trembling as he replied to that illusory urging: “…Mm.”
The hallucinatory her seemed pleased with his obedience. She came over and sat on his lap, kissing his forehead, holding his face and rubbing her cheek against his, pressing the tip of her nose to his and laughing. Her lukewarm breath fanned across his face. She then teasingly bit his earlobe, as if deliberately bullying him, and finally lowered her head to lick his Adam’s apple, as innocent and curious as that time before.
“So good.” The illusion in his mind spoke again, her tone as pure as the real her in everyday life. “Su Heng, do you like me?”
He didn’t answer.
After a long moment, as if finally succumbing to the voice’s bewitchment, he spoke softly, his voice reserved. “Can you… call me that again?”
“Hm? Call you what?”
Su Heng looked up at the stark white ceiling. A breeze from the balcony drifted in, making the decorative pendants of the overhead light sway with an ambiguous rhythm. He recalled how, in his imagination, she was sitting on him, her fringe gently swaying as she leaned down to kiss him.
“Call me…” He struggled to roll out the word that made him so unbearably excited. “…Good Dog.”
“…Is that okay?”
No reply. The illusion vanished. It wasn’t really her.
Belatedly, he realized that he only wanted to hear that name from the real her. He snapped awake from the fantasy in an instant.
Dazed, he remembered where he was—still at the dining table. It seemed… he had been thinking about inappropriate things in his head. Shamelessly, he had wanted to be her appetizer before the meal.
The soup spoon clattered into the now-empty bowl, making an unusual sound.
Su Heng’s back stiffened. He leaned back against the dining chair, his neck tilting back as he panted rapidly, that purring mating call rumbling from his throat.
…This was terrible. Not only was desensitization impossible, but now he was actually going into heat over her illusion?
This couldn’t continue. He was no longer able to stay under the same roof as her in his unmedicated Rut state without taking measures to suppress it.
Su Heng took out his phone, and through his dizzy, blurry vision, found Qu Sheng’s contact.
The other party seemed to be busy; the phone rang for a long time without an answer. In the meantime, the phantom her continued to tease him until he felt bonelessly weak. He gripped his phone tightly just to prevent it from falling like the spoon had.
He wanted to use his other hand to brace against the table’s edge to resist the wave after wave of unbearable excitement coursing through his body in the Rut state. But no matter how hard he tried to exert force, his Mechanical Arm remained immobile, hanging limply at his side.
He could only close his eyes, trying to ignore the pervasive presence of her.
After a good while, the call finally connected.
“Hello?” Qu Sheng’s voice came through the receiver. He seemed to be on the move, the background noise quickly shifting from chaotic to quiet. “Lord Commander? Sorry, sorry, I was just tied up. Is there something you need me for?”
Su Heng couldn’t respond right away. He was still trying to catch his breath. Controlling such harsh panting so it wouldn’t be transmitted through the phone was difficult enough; he was afraid the instant he spoke, he would reveal his abnormal state. This state he was in… only she could know about.
“Lord Commander?” Qu Sheng asked again, a hint of confusion in his tone.
Only then did Su Heng speak, his voice low. “Qu Sheng, that Beastman Clinic you mentioned last time—give me the contact information.”
“Oh, oh, right.” Qu Sheng sensed something significant but didn’t pry. “Just a moment, I’ll send it to you.”
“Mm.”
Su Heng was about to hang up. His finger hovered over the screen for a few seconds before he added, “I just think it’s wise to understand this clinic you mentioned. It doesn’t conflict with my purpose for coming to the Federation, and might even yield some useful information.”
The more he explained, the guiltier he sounded. As Lord Commander, he could simply issue orders without needing to justify them at all.
Qu Sheng, ever adept at navigating social subtleties, glossed over it with a chuckle, pretending not to notice.
“Haha, of course. Lord Commander has thought of everything, as always,” Qu Sheng added a few more persuasive lines. “That Beastman Clinic has provided considerable assistance to the Federation’s Beastmen since its establishment. With the war looming, whether seeking support from our Federation Beastman compatriots or protecting them from the conflict’s disruption, organizations friendly to Beastmen like this could be useful. If we could gain the support of the public opinion on the Beastman Forum, it might even benefit Erga.”
His implication was clear: he would only provide the contact information and necessary intel, but actually winning over Federation-friendly Beastman groups would require Su Heng’s personal effort.
Su Heng naturally understood the Old Fox’s intentions. In his current state, he didn’t have the energy to quibble with him. He ended the conversation curtly. Shortly after hanging up, Qu Sheng sent over the Beastman Clinic’s contact details.
~
There was still plenty of time before Jiang Ying got off work; he had enough time.
While the symptoms of his Rut were becoming increasingly uncontrollable, the severe Rejection Reaction triggered by his prosthetic the night before had largely subsided. Besides his still-pale complexion and his immobile right arm, he had no other significant discomfort.
Su Heng pulled on a hoodie, donned a baseball cap, contacted the Beastman Clinic, and took a taxi to the address Qu Sheng provided.
It was an extremely unassuming clinic, requiring several twists and turns down alleyways after getting out of the taxi. Someone not adept with directions might need quite some time to find it.
Compared to Jin Chuyun’s Psychological Clinic, this place looked exactly like the kind of folk medicine hall one only visited through personal referral. Unlike the former, with its latest AI medical reception robot handling consultations, triage, wayfinding, and payments for patients, this clinic had only a few people bustling about.
When Su Heng walked into the lobby, a nurse working nearby called out, “Doctor Wen, someone’s here for you!”
“How many times have I told you, my surname is ‘Wenren’…”
Wenren Xu walked out of his office sporting a pair of dark circles under his eyes. He visibly froze upon seeing the Beastman standing at the entrance.
Wasn’t this… the dog kept by little junior sister’s friend? No—the Beastman she employed? Qu Sheng had recommended him specifically?
Wenren Xu wasn’t sure if Su Heng had any recollection of yesterday’s events and silently swallowed his shock.
The moment Su Heng saw him, he recognized him as the person Jiang Ying had summoned to treat him yesterday. Though he had been nearly unconscious yesterday, he had retained a sliver of awareness. When the other man had approached, Su Heng had launched an instinctive defensive strike, simultaneously taking in the appearance of the person trying to inject him with medication.
What a coincidence. Another key figure appearing around her. And he couldn’t find a single flaw. From his prosthetic malfunctioning, to her finding someone to treat him, to him today seeking a Beastman Clinic recommendation from Qu Sheng for “personal reasons”—every link in the chain was purely coincidental, not orchestrated.
At this moment, neither man brought up the previous day’s events. Wenren Xu stepped forward and cleared his throat lightly. “Hello, are you here for a consultation? Please, come with me.”
Wenren Xu seemed like a chatty young man, but his office looked like that of a seasoned old-timer. On the desk were red date and goji berry tea, a bottle of Vitamin C effervescent tablets, a box of Melatonin, a pack of steam eye masks, and a U-shaped pillow, foldable recliner, and air-conditioning blanket—everything fully stocked.
“Ahem,” he gestured for Su Heng to sit across from him. “May I ask what you need to consult about?”
Su Heng looked up and, expressionless, described his condition. “Since yesterday’s injection, I’ve been experiencing symptoms of Delirium.”
Wenren Xu was taken aback. “That shouldn’t be possible. Neither of those medications lists that as a side eff—” He suddenly stopped short. The other hadn’t even played his trump card, and he’d already confessed.
Seeing the “as I thought” ease appear on Su Heng’s face, Wenren Xu dropped the act. “Alright, I was the one who gave you the injections yesterday.”
He laid his cards on the table. “One was a painkiller. Your condition yesterday was very poor; I was worried it might trigger the Berserk state. The other was a stabilizer. This medication needs to be injected daily; I just had someone mail a week’s supply to your place.”
Su Heng remained silent, waiting for him to continue. His expressionless face exuded an intangible pressure. Coupled with the subconscious ruthlessness he’d displayed while semi-conscious yesterday, Wenren Xu warily scooted his chair back a little.
He stated confidently, “Logically speaking, Delirium isn’t among the side effects of either drug.”
“Is that so.”
Su Heng was noncommittal. Those two simple words, devoid of emotion, made Wenren Xu tense up again. He vaguely sensed that the Beastman before him was no ordinary individual. Of course, what kind of meek creature could a Beastman be—one who had survived this long with the first batch of experimental prosthetics attached to his shoulder?
“Of course, there can be exceptions. After all, the world’s understanding of Beastman Medicine is still superficial,” Wenren Xu hedged. “What form does your Delirium take? I need to assess its cause, whether it’s related to my medication.”
Su Heng remained silent for a moment. “I see…” He paused for two seconds before continuing, “Her.”
“Ah?”
Her? Wenren Xu took a moment to process, thinking back to yesterday—how that same murderous figure had instantly turned into an obedient dog under Jiang Ying’s soothing touch.
It dawned on him. “Oh, oh, her, huh?”
After another moment’s thought, he looked conflicted. “This… this doesn’t seem like drug-induced Delirium. It’s more like…”
He observed Su Heng’s expression and asked carefully, “You’re currently going through your Rut Cycle, aren’t you?”
The Beastman’s stoic expression flickered for an instant. He seemed to have anticipated this answer but was unwilling to admit it. Laboriously suppressing his conflicting emotions, he countered with feigned composure, “Yes. Is that related?”
“For some Beastmen during their Rut Cycle, if desires aren’t satisfied and comfort isn’t received in time, the prolonged accumulation of pent-up emotion can cause corresponding physical symptoms. It’s the body’s way of coping with its needs. Delirium is one of those dual physiological and psychological phenomena that occur when a Beastman is in an extreme state of longing for a partner. If the Rut state isn’t relieved, over time it can further impact mind and body, worsening the Delirium.”
Simply put, it was lovesickness. Wenren Xu didn’t dare tell him that so bluntly.
Su Heng’s breath hitched, thinking to himself—so it was indeed as he’d suspected.
“Is there a solution?” he asked. His primary purpose in visiting the Psychology Clinic had been to make contact with Jin Chuyun. But given the current situation, he couldn’t suppress this without stronger methods.
“The most radical cure would be sterili—”
Under the suddenly freezing glare, Wenren Xu hastily corrected himself. “Which is, of course, off the table!”
He paused before continuing. “This is, after all, a Beastman physiological phenomenon. It can’t be completely suppressed. There are only temporary inhibitory methods on the market. I assume you’ve already tried those without success, which is why you’re experiencing this condition?”
Su Heng: “Yes. I’m allergic to the ingredients in standard Suppressants.”
“No wonder,” Wenren Xu said, unsurprised. “I’ve treated similar cases. To be frank, there aren’t many options. Unless—”
“Unless?”
“After that patient’s visit, my clinic began researching non-traditional suppression methods. It requires extracting the Pheromones of the person triggering the Beastman’s Rut. Using those as the main component, we create a Personalized Suppressant tailored to the individual patient. It doesn’t contain the standard Suppressant ingredients, so allergies aren’t an issue. However—”
Wenren Xu always left a cliffhanger, which irritated Su Heng. Battling his restless yearning for her, he asked, “However?”
“The catch is, like the stabilizer, it requires daily, continuous use. If stopped, there’s a rebound effect. All the previously suppressed desires and urges will erupt in full force.”
Su Heng stated flatly, “Then I simply won’t stop using it.”
“Very well, since you insist.” Wenren Xu dropped the final bombshell. “However, I’ll need to collect a sample of Miss Jiang’s Pheromones first.”
“…” Su Heng fell silent. He didn’t want her to know that he was going into heat thinking about her every single day, let alone that he needed her Pheromones to make his medicine.
Wenren Xu saw through his thoughts. “Miss Jiang doesn’t need to come in person for the collection. You just need to bring her Pheromones here.”
Su Heng’s eyes flickered. “How do I bring them?”
“Ah, well, that is, you know… Spend plenty of intimate time together, and your Gland will temporarily retain a sample of her Pheromones, you see?”