Chapter 14
A must-have item for the new generation maid. Out with the old, in with the new age of science!
Powerful suction that could suck up any trash, except for human trash.
A flexible body that could move freely.
A long stick that could be used to whack intruders if necessary.
This revolutionary cleaning tool, the dream and hope of maids everywhere, was—!
“Estella, I’m telling you, the power source is a magic stone. It’s a magical tool. You keep praising it as a product of science, but…”
“Quiet, magician.”
“I’m saying this because I am a magician. Professor Ganymede, the developer of the power source, was a scholar of energy studies when I was in the academy…”
“Estella is too ignorant to understand that.”
“Then you can learn it now. Professor Ganymede, you see…”
“Estella plans to remain ignorant! I don’t have a brain! Physically, I don’t have a brain! My head is empty! Empty! Can you hear that? The clear, metallic sound coming from my head!”
“What if you break your head hitting it like that! If you want a brain, just say so normally!”
“I don’t want one! I want to be an empty can!”
“Hey!”
Anyway, the secret weapon I requested from the young master was a state-of-the-art vacuum cleaner!
It was designed to be worn like a backpack, with a long stick for cleaning the floor. Not only could it clean floors, but it could also be customized with different tubes and attachments.
An all-purpose cleaning tool that I could customize to my heart’s content!
Well, it could also be used as a weapon.
“We’re buying this to fight zombies. Not to buy you a cleaning tool.”
“The sleek curves of the ceramic metal, the elasticity of the rubber tube! Even the design by a dwarven craftsman! It’s a treasure that even the head maid of a Duke’s household wouldn’t have!”
“You do realize you’re buying a weapon, right?”
“Uh… Of course, yes, yes. A weapon, well, anything can be a weapon if you swing it. Or throw it.”
After much deliberation, the young master allowed the purchase on the condition that it be modified into a weapon.
He even said he would buy it this week!
Ah, this job was amazing. I could never leave this boss.
“There’s a main branch in Metal City, so we can place an order there. We should be able to receive it by this weekend.”
“Metal City?”
“Yes. It’s the nickname for Raguel City. It’s an autonomous district ruled by Knight Commander Raguel…”
For once, the young master sounded like a magician.
“It’s full of scientists, so it makes me uncomfortable.”
An amount far exceeding my salary was scribbled on a blank check. The young master wrote a simple order form and put it in an envelope with the check.
“We’ll depart for Metal City tonight and start hunting zombies right away. We’re still short on zombie cores. We need to hurry.”
I couldn’t stop smiling as I received the envelope. The young master pointed to the door of his office and smiled faintly.
“Are you that happy? Deliver the envelope to Godora, and we’ll leave immediately.”
“Yes!”
***
Head Butler Godora. Although he was nearing seventy, he was healthier and more energetic than anyone else in the Zepetto Count household.
He was also a workaholic who woke up at five every morning to take care of the Count’s breakfast and everything else until bedtime. He never forgot to exercise and take care of his health, always with a smile on his face.
Except in certain situations.
“Will Young Master Lupin ever get married?”
The head butler pondered deeply. He had never left Lupin’s side since the day he was born. Lupin Zepetto, born intelligent and beautiful. Countless nobles wanted him as their son-in-law.
The problem was that Lupin refused every proposal.
The head butler believed the reason was Anna, the maid who had died five years ago. The way Lupin looked at her had been unusual.
He was excessively affectionate and possessive for someone who was supposed to be just a childhood friend. But the head butler hadn’t worried too much. He assumed it was just a passing childhood crush, a form of friendship, and overlooked it.
Anna had never been considered a potential bride. Her status was far too low compared to Lupin’s.
She was a servant bought cheaply by the previous Countess during a visit to the circus, and she had five potential fathers. Naturally, she didn’t even have an inherited name.
When Anna died, the head butler had been saddened, but also secretly relieved. He thought the young master would finally stop chasing after a maid and start a family.
However, he was mistaken. The young master grieved deeply and then rejected every single marriage proposal. He didn’t explicitly say it was because of Anna, but it was obvious. He still hadn’t forgotten the deceased maid.
And what was with the scene he had witnessed today!
The young master, unable to forget the maid, had gone completely mad and was trying to take a talking maid doll as his concubine.
That affectionate scene of them trying to undress each other! The image from the workshop haunted Godora’s mind. Even now, he felt dizzy.
“What if he ends up spending his whole life with dolls?”
The thought of Lupin becoming an old man, playing house with dolls, made his heart sink. He even felt tears welling up.
Anna would have been better. At least she was human. Estella was just a doll.
The head butler carefully reviewed the document in front of him. It was a list of potential brides he had meticulously compiled over the past few months. It was filled with names of noble ladies who had already proposed and those he planned to approach.
He had prioritized ladies who were cute and resembled Anna in hopes of swaying the young master’s heart…
“If his taste in appearance is closer to Estella, I’ll have to rearrange the list. Bonus points for black hair! Bonus points for fair skin! Bonus points for violet eyes!”
The head butler steeled his resolve.
The young master was twenty-five this year. The previous Count and Countess had been twenty-five when they had him. It was late.
In Godora’s mind, the ideal age for marriage was around fifteen, just before puberty hit. They were already ten years behind schedule.
“I must get the young master married this year!”
Married this year, a son or daughter in two years, twins would be fine too.
The head butler, lost in his dreams of a future the person in question hadn’t even considered, was startled by a sudden knock.
“Head Butler! Head Butler Godora!”
The culprit who had caused the head butler so much anguish was about to appear.
“Ahem.”
He deliberately spread out the list of potential brides on his desk and lifted his chin before answering.
“Come in, Estella!”
***
By the weekend, the all-purpose vacuum cleaner (well, a weapon as well) would be in my hands.
I, Estella, had obtained the young master’s seal and a blank check. My body had been strengthened, and my new maid uniform was crisp from ironing.
I felt amazing!
I could even hum a tune. Because I had nostrils now!
“Head Butler Godora, here are the documents to be sent to Raguel City. Please deliver them as soon as possible.”
I hummed as I handed him the envelope. The head butler twitched his mustache and glanced conspicuously at the documents on his desk.
‘He laid them out for me to see, didn’t he?’
I couldn’t ignore his desperate attempt. I deliberately raised my voice in feigned surprise.
“Oh my! What are all these documents! They look very important! Should I deliver them directly to the young master so he can approve them easily?”
“Ahem, these documents, you see…”
The head butler quickly gathered the papers and waved them in front of me. Photos of elegantly dressed young ladies fluttered like butterfly wings.
“These are the candidates for the young master’s future bride.”
He kept giving me meaningful looks, as if expecting a certain reaction from me. I couldn’t figure out what he wanted.
I decided to play along and figure out the answer as we went.
“Wow—these are the candidates for the young master’s future bride!”
“Yes, all of them are from distinguished families.”
“Wow—they’re all from distinguished families!”
“And the daughter of the Daltate Duke family was even the top student at the Ritvara Academy!”
“Wow—Lady Daltate, the top student at the Ritvara Academy…”
Suddenly, I felt a chill run down my nonexistent spine. My instincts screamed:
Danger! Don’t get involved!
Daltate? Daltate? Where had I heard that name before?
The conversation I had with the young master a few hours ago flashed through my mind. The moment we encountered the zombies.
—The nearest cemetery is owned by the Daltate Duke family, who have royal blood. The remains of the Duke family members and their loyal subjects are buried there.
—Gasp. Does that mean the zombies slowly approaching us were once nobles?
Yes, that’s right.
Among the zombies the young master and I had beaten up…
There might have been an ancestor of Lady Daltate…
“Lady Daltate is not a suitable candidate.”
“Hmm? Why not?!”
“For ethical, ethical reasons…”
I changed the subject before the head butler could question me further. I couldn’t let him find out.
“Should I deliver this list of potential brides to the young master now?”
“Yes! You personally! Give it to the young master, and it would be great if you could also emphasize the benefits of marriage.”
“Eh, me? I’ve never been married, so I wouldn’t know…”
I took the list anyway. Even though I had never been married, I thought I could come up with some benefits if I put my mind to it.
“Benefits, benefits…”
As I was browsing the list of potential brides, thinking about the benefits of marriage…
“Oh, no!”
There was a young lady who immediately caught my eye.
The head butler and I exchanged meaningful glances. His feathery mustache twitched.
“You saw it too.”
“Th-this person…!”
I had to show this list to the young master right away!
I grabbed the list and ran out. As I did, I turned around and shouted,
“The vacuum cleaner order form I gave you is extremely important! Don’t forget to mail it!”
“You impudent girl! Ordering the head butler around! Alright! I’ll send it right away!”