14. Don’t Love Someone Like Me
The plot of the play was as follows.
Marriott’s Tragedy… though it was billed as a tragedy, it was closer to an ensemble drama.
A chimney sweep named Marriott falls in love with a young woman named Lina, who works in a dressmaker’s shop. Lina dreams of one day owning her own shop, and her relationship with Marriott is one of conversation only. He couldn’t bring himself to hold her hand; hers, accustomed to handling fine fabrics, were white and pristine, while his were too stained with soot.
And so, wanting to support the hardworking and ambitious Lina, Marriott takes on more work… and eventually gets involved in some shady business.
Drawn in by the lucrative pay, Marriott’s hands, once covered in soot, now clutched wads of cash. If he kept this up, he might even be able to buy Lina a shop.
Meanwhile, Lina is told by the shopkeeper that he might make her the head designer, but implies that she must enter into a physical relationship with him. Overwhelmed with work and unable to consult Marriott, Lina is swept along and gives in to the shopkeeper’s advances.
Marriott amasses a large sum of money. There were times his life was in danger, but the soot stains on his hands vanished, and he began to wear well-tailored clothes.
When he meets Lina again after a long time, Marriott is overjoyed to learn she has been promoted to head designer. When he tells her he will buy her a shop, Lina pushes him away, saying, “I am not worthy of such a thing. Don’t love someone like me,” and puts distance between them.
Marriott is stunned. Why? He had worked so hard for her—at times risking his life, at times even taking the lives of others—so why was she rejecting him? Unable to understand, he peeks through the window of the boutique, where a light is still on late at night.
There, he sees Lina, now actively seducing the shopkeeper, and the shopkeeper, captivated by her beauty, granting her requests.
And so, Marriott’s hands are no longer stained with soot, but with blood. And with that indelible stain, he comes to regret it all, realizing that what he truly needed was the time he could have spent by Lina’s side.
Lina, while keeping the memory of Marriott the chimney sweep in her heart, eventually manipulates the shopkeeper, gets the money, and opens her own boutique.
It is a shop that also handles menswear. Perhaps Marriott might come one day. But by then, Marriott, unable to do anything about his stained hands, had already left the city.
…
I had read the book, but seeing it as a play, I was overwhelmed by the actors’ performances.
“…Don’t love someone like me.”
“Sheryl?”
“Oh, it’s nothing. It was a wonderful play, wasn’t it? I’m afraid I cried a little.”
I dabbed at my eyes with a handkerchief, trying to pass off the words that had slipped out so naturally.
My makeup wouldn’t come off without a special oil, but even so, the play had struck a deep chord within me.
When I had read the book, I still had the luxury of dreaming. But now that my dream had become a reality, being confronted with this story hit me hard.
It’s not as if I’ve been sullied by someone. But I was born unattractive… not beautiful.
And the person next to me? A breathtakingly handsome man. His station is high. Is there any part of me that is a worthy match for him?
(No, Sheryl. You’re just getting emotional because of the play. You can’t become self-deprecating.)
‘You truly are an unattractive child, aren’t you?’
Of all the times, my first meeting with my stepmother had to flash through my mind now.
At Hugues’s prompting, I stood up. Outside, the darkness was held at bay only by the faint glow of the streetlights, and the night air felt a little chilly. It was probably because my spirits were so low.
Hugues draped his jacket over my shoulders. Even though it was summer, he noticed the slightest change in me and showed me such kindness.
We waited for our carriage a short distance from the theater entrance. Hugues tried to make conversation, but I could only give half-hearted replies.
Don’t love someone like me.
How much easier would it be if I could just say the words aloud? It was all I could do to swallow them.
“Sheryl.”
And then, Hugues pulled me into his arms.
Even though it was dark and there was no one around, to do this in the middle of the street… The thought that it was improper crossed my mind, but he was holding me, holding all my worries close.
“I don’t know what is troubling you so much. But, Sheryl, the reason I fell for you… the reason I have wanted no one but you in my heart… is because you are a beautiful person.”
“Wh-what are you…”
“And I’m not just talking about your appearance. Your movements, the effort you put into them, and of course your appearance is lovely as well… but our conversations are also a joy. Everything about you is truly beautiful. …Please, Sheryl. Don’t say things that will make me give up on you, like you did that day.”
Hugues’s sweet words made the warm, candle-like flame in my chest flicker. I wrapped my arms around his broad back and hugged him in return.
I didn’t have the strength to simply say, “I will.” For now, this was the best I could do.