Chapter 5
Fan An was certain the silver-haired man was a streamer.
Exhibit A: his waist-length hair, which was right on trend with the “ancient-style pretty boy” aesthetic.
Exhibit B: the burly man in sunglasses standing beside him. He looked like a soldier and his whole getup screamed professionalism.
“Traveling with a bodyguard in tow? He must be a popular streamer.”
An’an’s curiosity was piqued.
Streamers and actors were both in the entertainment industry. Since they were all in the same circle, perhaps there was something the rookie actress An’an could learn from the silver-haired man.
“I’m going to stay and observe for a bit. You go on back to the crew,” Fan An told the second male lead. Her part was done anyway. Her work for the day was over; now it was time for self-study.
The second male lead left alone. An’an moved to a hidden corner and peered down, concentrating, not wanting to miss a single detail.
She noticed the burly man in sunglasses was carrying a leather briefcase.
“I didn’t realize bodyguards these days also have to double as makeup artists,” the girl sighed. “The competition in the entertainment industry is terrifying.”
You really can’t judge a book by its cover. Bodyguard Bro was built like a tank, all muscle and brawn, yet he possessed the deft hands needed to draw perfect eyeliner and apply highlighter.
Silver-Haired Bro was probably a male model before he became a streamer. With his looks, getting ads for shampoo, conditioner, and hair dye would be a piece of cake.
“I wonder what his account name is. I’d love to follow him,” An’an thought, trying to guess.
“AAA190 Silver-Haired Male Model? Cold-Faced Model Teaches You Haircare (DM for classes)? Undersea Edition of Lone Swordsman Silver Wolf?”
She searched for each one, but came up with nothing. The only result was an official statement on the Armed Detective Agency’s blog: “There is only one Lone Swordsman Silver Wolf. Please do not spread rumors about our President. Leave the elderly alone!”
(T/N: A reference to Yukichi Fukuzawa, the President of the Armed Detective Agency in “Bungo Stray Dogs.”)
Fan An: Hontou ni sumimasen, but President Fukuzawa’s hair really isn’t as silky smooth as Silver-Haired Bro’s.
(T/N: “I’m so sorry” in Japanese.)
“Why can’t I find his account? Am I searching in the wrong direction?” An’an pondered.
She had searched through the urban exploration, paranormal, makeup, and hairstyling communities, but found no trace of Silver-Haired Bro or Bodyguard Bro’s accounts.
Could it be that they were even newer than she was? Were they here at the abandoned distillery today to film a video to launch their channel?
As Fan An was thinking, the burly man in sunglasses opened the briefcase.
Even from three floors up, Fan An could not mistake its contents.
It was something known the world over, a true, undisputed, universally beloved superstar.
It was—money.
A briefcase overflowing with cash appeared before Fan An’s eyes.
Wait.
Wait, wait, wait.
She seemed to have misunderstood something.
Fan An watched, wide-eyed, as Bodyguard Bro picked up a stack of bills. The corner of his mouth, hidden behind his sunglasses, curled into a villainous smirk. “We brought the money. Where’s your merchandise?”
Silver-Haired Model Bro stood coolly to the side, lighting a cigarette. As he raised his hand, the black handle of a gun peeked out from his waist.
An’an: “…”
What channel launch? This wasn’t a livestream, it was a crime scene!
“I can’t judge people with prejudice,” the girl said, closing her eyes. “Maybe they’re just filming a short skit for TikTok.”
New streamers use all sorts of tricks. Couldn’t this be considered a way to attract followers?
Fan An tried very hard to convince herself. She almost succeeded.
—If her special ability hadn’t chosen that exact moment to unlock.
…
Fan An, a newly-minted resident of Beika Town. After her parents passed away from illness, she had lived with her cousin Hanzawa in Izumo, so she had always considered Izumo her hometown.
But in truth, before her parents’ death, she was a born-and-bred native of Yokohama.
Yokohama, a city whose feng shui either withers ordinary folk or forges them into something else. A grand stage for ability-users to clash—if you’ve got the guts and the luck, you’re welcome to try.
“Testing confirms: you are an ability-user.”
The government official from the Special Division for Unusual Powers, Sakaguchi Ango, registered the girl. “I need to create a file for you. Can you tell me the name of your ability?”
(T/N: A direct crossover with “Bungo Stray Dogs.” Sakaguchi Ango is a character from that series.)
Asking about the effects of someone’s ability was rude, but asking for the name was perfectly fine. Even if you didn’t ask, ability-users would always shout the name of their ability when they used it. For example:
“SASUKE—”
“NARUTO—”
For true powerhouses, their abilities are voice-activated.
Fan An had no reason to refuse. She cleared her throat, her eyes darting to the ceiling, to the floor, anywhere but at Sakaguchi Ango.
“[My Respected ■■ Mentor].”
Sakaguchi Ango: “…What?”
Fan An repeated: “My ability is called [My Respected ■■ Mentor].”
Sakaguchi Ango: “Wait, what’s with the ‘■■’? Is it a censored word?”
Fan An: “The ‘■■’ is just ‘■■’. It’s not ** or OO, it’s just ‘■■’.”
It wasn’t a censored word or a placeholder for something vulgar. Her ability’s name was just inexplicably missing two characters, like the mosaic bar placed over a suspect’s eyes.
Sakaguchi Ango had never encountered such a bizarre situation. How could an ability name be missing characters?
Imagine if Mori Ougai’s ability, [Vita Sexualis], was written as [Vita ■■]. What would the Port Mafia executives think?
Or Tanizaki Junichirou’s [Light Snow]. It’s only two characters to begin with. If it became [■■], who the hell would know what his ability was? Edogawa Ranpo would face the greatest Waterloo of his detective career.
“Mr. Sakaguchi,” An’an asked worriedly, seeing him fall into an existential silence, “is there any hope for me?”
Sakaguchi Ango: You’re a lost cause. Next.
He really wanted to say that. Unfortunately, Sakaguchi Ango was a proper civil servant who had passed his exams. Government employees couldn’t slack off. He could only work overtime, poring over documents to solve An’an’s mystery.
“For this to happen, it’s likely because your ability hasn’t met its unlocking conditions,” Sakaguchi Ango concluded after pulling an all-nighter.
It was a rare situation, but it did exist. Nakajima Atsushi from the Armed Detective Agency next door had only realized that the cat in the meme pointing at another cat and saying “Transform! Transform for me!” was, in fact, his own tiger-self after meeting his life mentor, Dazai Osamu.
The world is full of strange things. Even when faced with registering an ability-user whose ability was named [My Respected ■■ Mentor], Sakaguchi Ango didn’t waver in the slightest.
“Calm your mind and feel,” he said profoundly. “The ability will tell you its unlocking conditions.”
A civil servant is a civil servant for a reason. Sakaguchi Ango had earned his position through real skill. Fan An did as he said and, sure enough, she figured out the unlocking condition for [My Respected ■■ Mentor].
“—Encounter a mortal crisis.”
The dark-haired girl murmured to herself, “That’s my ability’s unlocking condition.”
The criminal transaction before her was the real deal.
Not only that, but the silver-haired man and his accomplice would soon discover her presence and silence her.
Death was just around the corner.
An ability that had remained locked for her entire eighteen years was unlocked in less than three days after arriving in Beika Town.
The prestige of the City of Crime continued to rise.
Right now, the silver-haired man didn’t seem to have noticed An’an on the third floor, but she trusted her ability. Its sudden awakening was surely not for nothing.
What the girl didn’t know was that a similar scene had once occurred at Tropical Land. A certain high school detective, after witnessing Bodyguard Bro’s transaction, was bludgeoned with a baseball bat by Silver-Haired Model Bro, transforming him from a 174cm high schooler into a 102cm first-grader.
The fruits of over a decade of diligent study were wiped out in an instant. All those practice problems and exams he’d completed were ultimately for naught.
The detective was lucky. Although he lost his height and his academic record, he at least kept his life.
“Calm down, calm down,” An’an breathed softly. “Good news: my ability is unlocked. Bad news: I think I’m about to die.”
Even worse news: she still didn’t know what category her ability fell into.
Ability-users were a group with an extremely high ceiling and an extremely low floor. At the peak of power, you had [For the Tainted Sorrow]; for conceptual gods, you had [No Longer Human]. Outsiders could easily be blinded by the strength of the Twin Dark duo and mistakenly think all ability-users were powerful.
In reality, the ability-user community also had people like this: he was one of the five executives of the Port Mafia, his ability had a cool name, [The Overcoat], and its effect was astonishing—it could turn his subordinates’ lifespans into jewels of equal value. But—the prerequisite for using the ability was that the target had to willingly put on a collar he gave them.
(T/N: This is a reference to the character Ace from “Bungo Stray Dogs” and his useless ability.)
In Fan An’s current situation, that would be like: she walks up to Silver-Haired Bro and Bodyguard Bro, hands them two collars she’d hand-rolled herself, and tells them, “Please put on these collars, and then I can take your damn lives.”
Silver-Haired Bro would immediately pull his gun and shoot her dead.
“How can something as useless as A’s ability exist in this world!” Fan An criticized, frustrated by his lack of utility. “And this guy managed to get a high-paying job! How did he do it?!”
No wonder Dazai Osamu quit. Who wouldn’t be angry?
Right now, An’an was unarmed. The enemy had three people, all armed. If she couldn’t manifest a powerful ability, she was probably going to meet her end here today.
Great Saiki Kusuo, please grant me your protection. My ability can’t be non-recyclable garbage like A’s. Kami-sama, bless me!
The girl prayed piously, finally mustering the courage to face her freshly-baked ability.
[My Respected ■■ Mentor] flickered twice, and under its master’s gaze, its true name was revealed.
Fan An slowly read her ability’s true name aloud: “My Respected… Crime Mentor?”
Huh?
Huh huh huh?
Wasn’t something wrong here?
Wasn’t she trying to save herself? Wasn’t she a law-abiding citizen? Why had she suddenly gone from victim to perpetrator?
“Are you even a proper ability?” the dark-haired girl asked her reflection in a wall tile.
Could it be that everything was fated from the moment her parents named her Fan An?
Oh, my parents in heaven, what were you thinking back then?
“One shouldn’t speak ill of the dead. How can I blame my parents?” Fan An took out a precious photo of her family. On the back was a line of text: Father Fan An (犯岸), Mother Fan An (犯谙), and daughter Fan An (犯安).
(T/N: “Father”s name sounds like “shore,” her mother’s like “proficient,” and hers like “safe,” but all are homophones for “criminal.”)
Mom and Dad just wanted the family to be neat and tidy. What’s wrong with that?
What’s fated is fated. It was her own ability; she had no choice but to cherish it.
Fan An focused her mind and examined her newfound power.
[My Respected Crime Mentor]
People die when they are killed. In this world of kill or be killed, everyone longs for the earnest teachings of a professional mentor.
They will teach you everything they know, passing on their entire skillset, from the secrets of destroying evidence to the techniques of framing others. A wide variety of skills for you to pick and choose. Don’t miss out! Come and pick your mentor now! (Click to view mentor candidate pool)
Fan An: “This sounds like a scam ad.”
Even though it was her own ability, she felt she shouldn’t be so disgusted on a moral level, but…
“This is suspicious. Way too suspicious.” An’an finally understood why her ability would only unlock at the brink of death—if she weren’t about to die, she’d be in a taxi on her way to a mental hospital right now.
The situation was urgent, and she had no other choice. The mentor candidate pool flickered like an LED sign. The girl took a deep breath and clicked on it.
Whoosh. A list of 999+ mentor candidates flooded her vision. Fan An glanced over it and saw a long stream of names.
[Selectable Mentor: Shimura Danzo]
[Selectable Mentor: Kenjaku]
[Selectable Mentor: Mahito]
[Selectable Mentor: Kibutsuji Muzan]
…
(T/N: All are major villains from “Naruto,” “Jujutsu Kaisen,” and “Demon Slayer.”)
So many people, so many choices. Fan An was dazzled.
The mentors were displayed as 2×2 inch headshots. An’an didn’t want to judge by appearances, but why did these top-ranking mentors look like they were from a completely different show?
“Mentor Shimura Danzo looks quite old. Maybe he has more teaching experience?”
An’an clicked on Mentor Shimura Danzo’s profile. The first thing that caught her eye wasn’t his introduction, but his friendliness rating.
[Mentor Shimura Danzo, Friendliness: Zero Stars]
Ability’s friendly reminder: A mentor with a low friendliness rating may result in a poor teaching experience. Please choose with caution.
P.S. Zero stars is the lower limit for the friendliness rating, not the lower limit for the mentor.
An’an decisively passed on Mentor Shimura Danzo.
A bad education can ruin a child’s life. That old geezer looked like a habitual PUA expert. A bad egg with no professional ethics.
Fan An checked the mentor profiles one by one, searching for her dream teacher.
To her astonishment, the vast majority of crime mentors had a friendliness rating of zero stars. There were only a few with one star and a scant handful with two.
“Aren’t these all just heinous villains who’d have to be sent straight to jail the moment they’re summoned?” she demanded of her ability.
They were supposed to be mentors. Were they here to teach or to commit more crimes? They didn’t look like role models at all.
What was the difference between picking the wrong mentor and being born into the wrong family? Fan An would rather die, would rather jump from the third floor, than work for a crooked teacher!
Mentor Shimura Danzo, Mentor Kenjaku, Mentor Mahito, Mentor Kibutsuji Muzan, and the others were definitely not good people. She didn’t want to learn from them.
“Are there any super-friendly, yasashii mentors?” An’an requested. “Preferably one who can handle a sniper rifle and also cook a meal, someone as gentle and loving as a mother.”
(T/N: Yasashii means “gentle” or “kind” in Japanese.)
Ability: There is, my child. There is.
The mentor candidate pool refreshed. After filtering through the 999+ crime mentors, only one person remained.
Friendliness: five stars. A tear-jerkingly high rating. A breath of fresh air among crime mentors.
[Mentor Description: A highly skilled sniper who once served a mysterious criminal organization. He holds many secrets. Friendliness: Five Stars]
The descriptions “once served,” “criminal organization,” and “many secrets” made this mentor seem highly suspicious, but his friendliness rating was through the roof. He was the only five-star mentor in the pool. A super rare find.
“I choose you,” An’an made her decision.
The dark-haired girl reached out and touched the image of the young man in the void.
[Once a mentor is selected, the choice cannot be changed. Please confirm one last time.]
[Are you sure you want to study under Mentor Scotch?]