When Xu Huiqing got the news that her daughter had jumped off a building, her mind went completely blank. She couldn’t believe that her daughter, who had always been excellent in both academics and conduct, so well-behaved and sensible since childhood, was gone because of a relationship.
The media said she lacked love and had been subjected to some kind of PUA.
But her suicide note had only one line: “Mom, if you don’t love me, could you just not have given birth to me?”
How could she not love her? She was her first child. The vast majority of her love was concentrated on her. Half a lifetime of her energy and effort had been poured into her and her brother. How could she not love her?
Yet all the media, newspapers, and experts were analyzing that the reason her daughter was so easily manipulated by a scumbag was precisely because she was too starved for love. Deep down, she was so emotionally deprived that a few sweet words from someone else made her rush in like a moth to a flame, believing a man could fill the void inside her.
Below those analyses, others wrote about how ‘a happy childhood can heal a lifetime, while an unhappy childhood takes a lifetime to heal.’
Xu Huiqing felt as if thunder had struck her from a clear sky. She remembered when she was giving birth to her second child, her in-laws had secretly given her daughter away without her knowledge. It had taken her several years to find her daughter and bring her back. She had thought that since her daughter was so young then and wouldn’t remember, and she herself never mentioned that past, that as long as she didn’t speak of it, her daughter wouldn’t know or recall it. So she just kept her daughter very close.
When her son read the daughter’s suicide note, he said it was all her fault! Why else would his sister’s note mention no one else, leaving only that single sentence for her? Who else could it be?
Her husband, hitting middle age, had found a second spring and wanted to divorce her. Their daughter’s suicide became a convenient excuse. Everyone was blaming her. They blamed her for not being good enough, for failing as a mother, which is why her daughter jumped. They blamed her for pushing her son too hard, for being too controlling, which is why he wasn’t close to her and wanted to get away. They blamed her for not keeping up with the times, for falling behind the era, which is why her husband had an affair. It was all her fault!
Xu Huiqing felt the world spin around her. When she woke up again, a bizarre chunk of information had inexplicably appeared in her mind. It was something called 《The Wolf-like Overbearing CEO Dotes on His Little Wife Exclusively》, and she herself was the overbearing CEO’s original wife from that ‘pampered wife’ story—in name only, yet stubbornly occupying the position and refusing to leave. Naturally, this original wife met no good end, and her daughter died along with her.
Xu Huiqing did know about ‘Overbearing CEO Stories’. There was a book rental shop outside the school, after all. Since students weren’t allowed to bring phones, many rented books there. Although she wasn’t a homeroom teacher, she had seen students engrossed in those CEO romance novels countless times. What she found incomprehensible, however, was that her world was actually the world of a novel. In this ‘Overbearing CEO Doting Wife Story’, father and son fell for the same woman. The son was in anguished, obsessive, dark misery over the female lead, who was the overbearing CEO father’s ‘Little Pampered Wife’.
Xu Huiqing: Old lady staring at phone screen meme face!
What the hell? His mother and sister died, and the son falls in love with his father’s mistress? Xu Huiqing didn’t understand, but she was profoundly shaken!
The alien information gave her a splitting headache. When she woke again, she was on a delivery bed. Her daughter had been sent to her older sister-in-law’s place in the countryside less than half a month ago. Her son—the dark, obsessive ‘pining for father’s little wife’ boy—had just been born. She thought it was a dream, but even if it was a dream, she went crazy, throwing off the covers to go find her daughter.
Her mother, Mama Xu, who had come to visit, was so frightened she quickly pushed her back onto the bed: “You just gave birth! You can’t go out and catch a draft!”
Xu Huiqing grabbed Mother Zhao’s arm tightly: “Mom, where is Xiaoxi? Where’s Xiaoxi? Give Xiaoxi to me, quick, give her to me!”
She was sobbing so hard she could barely speak, but her words sent a jolt of alarm through Mother Zhao. She thought frantically, could her daughter-in-law know they’d given Xiaoxi away to another family? Who was the big mouth who blabbed in front of her? But she couldn’t tell the truth now. She coaxed her, “Xiaoxi is doing fine at home. Daidi is watching her. You just stay put and do your postpartum confinement. Once the baby is a little older, Xiaoxi will come back!”
But Xu Huiqing’s nails dug into Mother Zhao’s flesh as if they’d pierce through. She cried out hoarsely, “Where is Xiaoxi? I want to see Xiaoxi! Mom, give Xiaoxi back to me, now!” Mother Zhao, hurt by the grip, retorted angrily, “You’re making it sound like I sold Xiaoxi! Who’d want a useless little girl? Lie down properly and take good care of my grandson. Once the month of confinement is over, you’ll see Xiaoxi.”
“I want Xiaoxi right now! Mom, where is she? Bring her to me, okay? I can’t live without Xiaoxi. Please, just go get her for me, okay?” Xu Huiqing still hadn’t recovered from the shock of her daughter’s suicide. She was in a daze, unable to distinguish dream from reality.
Mama Xu, watching from the side, was heartbroken. She quickly urged Mother Zhao, “If Huiqing wants to see Xiaoxi, just let her see her. That’s her own flesh and blood. How could a mother not worry?” She then hastily comforted Xu Huiqing: “You can’t cry during the confinement month! You’ll ruin your eyes.”
Since the in-law was speaking, Mother Zhao, cradling her hard-won precious grandson, couldn’t bear to put him down. She curled her lip and said to Father Zhao, who was also sitting there doting on the baby, “Now that the grandson is born, if she wants to see Xiaoxi, let her have a look. The grandson still needs her milk. If she cries too hard and her milk dries up, my darling grandson will starve.” She poked the baby’s little cheek with her finger, cooing in a high-pitched, affected voice, “Isn’t that right? Hmm? Isn’t that right? We can’t starve our big, precious grandson, can we?”
Father Zhao was somewhat dismissive of the idea and paid no attention. The child was already given away, the money already received. How could bringing her back be that easy? But he didn’t say this in front of his daughter-in-law, afraid she would fight them to the death. When the firstborn was a girl, they had said to give her away or hide her in the countryside, then have a boy and claim he was the firstborn. She had been willing to give up her job to stop Xiaoxi from being sent away. If their daughter-in-law found out she had now lost her job and they had given Xiaoxi away behind her back, she would definitely try to kill them.
Seeing Xu Huiqing still trying to get up to find her daughter, Mother Zhao shot her a disdainful look and scolded, “Are you even a mother? Instead of feeding your newborn son, the first words out of your mouth are ‘Xiaoxi, Xiaoxi’! It’s not like Xiaoxi will run away. You don’t even ask about your son. Just count on your daughter to support you in the future, and don’t expect anything from your son!” She then smiled, playing with the baby in her arms and chirping, “Isn’t that right? You won’t support your bad mom in the future. Bad mom, won’t feed our precious grandson. Bad mom! Don’t take care of her!”
Even if it was a dream, hearing this made the lifetime good-tempered Xu Huiqing’s veins bulge on her forehead. She thought of her son’s relentless accusations after her daughter’s death, and then heard her mother-in-law’s words to the infant son now. Long-buried memories, obscured by time, suddenly resurfaced like dust blasted off a sealed lid. Her ears were filled with echoes of her in-laws teaching her son: “Hit Mama! Hit Mama!”
“Mama won’t let our big grandson have the popsicle. Bad Mama! Mama is bad! Hit her! Hit her!”
“She won’t even give our good grandson the chicken leg? What kind of lousy mother is this?” Mother Zhao would say in the local dialect, snatching the chicken leg from Xiaoxi’s bowl with her chopsticks and putting it into Zhao Bei’s bowl. “Our precious grandson eats it! They don’t get any!”
Xu Huiqing had just given birth and was at her physically weakest. In her distress, she began hemorrhaging heavily. In mere moments, the pad beneath her was soaked dark red. The mat wasn’t a good-quality one, but rather a child’s winter diaper—cotton stuffing stitched inside a cover pieced together from scraps of cloth, resembling a thicker version of a chair cushion from decades later. The thick diaper would soak up a child’s urine to prevent it from leaking through to the mattress.
It was Zhao Zongbao, just coming in, who noticed the blood-soaked pad. Terrified, he screamed, “Doctor! Doctor! My wife has fainted!”
This was the Town Health Center. The doctors there only knew how to deliver babies, prescribe basic Western medicine, and treat simple headaches and fevers. Seeing the blood-soaked pad, they were horrified. “She was fine just now! How did the mother suddenly suffer a major hemorrhage? What did you say to upset her? This is life-threatening!”
An older doctor rushed over with an IV bottle and immediately started an intravenous drip for Xu Huiqing, yelling, “Where’s the bamboo stretcher? Bring the bamboo stretcher over quickly! We need to send her to the city hospital!”
Their town was situated between Wu City County and the neighboring city. Going south led to Wu City, east to the next city—roughly the same distance. But the neighboring city’s medical facilities were far superior. They didn’t dare risk any delay and quickly urged the Xu family to take her there. “Go to the Sixth People’s Hospital! It’s a provincial-level Grade A maternity and children’s hospital!” Afraid they wouldn’t know the way, the old doctor added, “Forget it, Qiaolian, you guide them there!”
He then turned to Zhao Zongbao, who was standing there frozen. The old doctor shouted urgently, “What are you standing there for? Go get a taxi!” He also reminded him, “Don’t get a tricycle! Go to the Four-way Intersection and see if there’s a taxi!”
Although it was the mid-nineties, Water Wharf Town was a major thoroughfare, quite prosperous, and taxis from Wu City and the neighboring city often passed through.
Father Zhao shouted disgruntedly from behind, “Why call a taxi? Where’s the money for that? Just call a tricycle, that’ll do!”
Mama Xu, listening nearby, could no longer hold back. “I’ll pay for it, alright?” she said. “Even if you don’t care that my daughter just bore your Zhao family a grandson, think about the baby! Can he be exposed to the wind now? If something really bad happens to Huiqing, your grandson won’t have any breast milk to drink! We’ll see then whether the taxi fare is more expensive or formula!”
The Xu family were from a rural village, while the Zhao family had started a home appliance business in town years ago and lived quite prosperously. Xu Huiqing was considered to have married up, and the bride price had been substantial. After marrying into the town, the Xu family always felt they were a step below the Zhao family and couldn’t speak up. Otherwise, even with Mama Xu present, they wouldn’t have been treated so dismissively. Only then did Father Zhao remember his in-law was there. Embarrassed, he turned his head away and said to Zhao Zongbao, “A taxi. Call a taxi.”
The Town Health Center was barely a hundred meters from the Four-way Intersection. As luck would have it, a taxi was there, and they hurriedly called it over. Zhao Zongbao scooped up the semi-conscious Xu Huiqing and carried her to the taxi. In her dazed state, Xu Huiqing’s hand still clutched Mother Zhao’s clothing tightly. “Mom… Xiaoxi… I want Xiaoxi…”
Beside them, Mama Xu was frantic. She scolded her, “Look at the time! It’s still Xiaoxi this, Xiaoxi that! Xiaoxi can’t run away!” She pried Xu Huiqing’s fingers open. “I’ll take care of things here with Xiaoxi. You get in the car and go to the hospital, now!” Inwardly, she was cursing herself for being so blind back then, marrying her good daughter into such a family. When they first proposed, their words sounded sweeter than a song, saying they’d treat Huiqing like their own daughter. The reality was this kind of family!
Hearing her own mother say this, Xu Huiqing relaxed just a little. Her hand loosened, and she lost consciousness.
The taxi had limited space. Father Zhao, unable to tend to a postpartum woman, stayed behind in town. Mama Xu hurriedly found him and demanded, “Where did you take Xiaoxi? Bring her back now! Otherwise, Huiqing will be frantic again when she returns!”
Father Zhao blustered guiltily, “Daidi is watching her. What’s she got to be anxious about?”
Zhao Daidi was his second daughter, already married off. She was a hopeless love fool with absolutely no standing in her own in-laws’ household, let alone any authority over her younger brother’s child. Mama Xu, thinking of how desperately her daughter had fought for her child, said, “Before Huiqing gave birth, it was one thing for her sister-in-law to watch the child. But now that she’s delivered, bring the girl back immediately!” She anxiously stood at the entrance of the town clinic, watching the taxi drive away. She slapped her thigh. “Ai! Forget it! I’ll take care of her myself if I have to, alright?”
Mother Zhao carried the newborn into the front passenger seat of the taxi. She, too, suspected her daughter-in-law’s hemorrhage was triggered by learning they had given away her granddaughter. Cradling the baby, she grumbled, “Getting so worked up over a worthless little girl! All that time she was awake, she didn’t even glance at her son. First word out of her mouth is ‘Xiaoxi’!” Fuming, she turned her anger to the infant in her arms, muttering fiercely, “Don’t you take care of your mother when you grow up. What kind of lousy mother is she? I’ve never seen a daughter-in-law make so much trouble. Hemorrhaging?” Lowering her voice, she hissed through gritted teeth, “I honestly wish she’d just die!”
Zhao Zongbao was in the back seat, holding the unconscious Xu Huiqing. He heard every word his mother said clearly. The female doctor who had climbed in with Huiqing was also sitting there. Embarrassed, he snapped, “Mom, can you just stop talking for a minute?”
“What did I say?” Mother Zhao shot back defiantly. “What did I say that was wrong? Who’s as much trouble as her? When Xiaoxi was born, I said we should send that girl to the countryside. But no, she refused, and now look—she stubbornly got a perfectly good job destroyed! If we’d sent her to the countryside and hidden her in the mountains early on, who could have found her? In seven or eight years, bring her back and say she’s a relative’s daughter from her mother’s side. She could’ve helped with chores and looked after my grandson. Wouldn’t that have been perfect? But no, she wouldn’t listen; she just had to keep her close. The girl’s barely been gone a few days, and she’s already acting like she’s dying!”
She cradled the little baby in her arms, carefully pulling the patchwork quilt over the infant’s face to protect him, and clucked sympathetically, “My poor precious grandson, born all this time and hasn’t had a single drop of his mother’s milk. I’ve never seen such a cruel mother.”
The female doctor sitting in the back couldn’t hold back any longer. “The mother has a major hemorrhage! Can’t you people just shut up? Are you really not afraid she might die?!”
Hearing it was a case of a new mother with a major hemorrhage, a matter of life and death, the taxi driver floored the accelerator, sending the Santana flying down the unpaved dirt roads, leaving a trail of thick dust in its wake.