Seeing her eat so heartily, the childbirth companion lady in the neighboring bed clapped her hands and laughed, saying to Xu Huiqing, “Now you’ve got the right idea! You’ve just given birth, your body is weak, and you need serious nourishment. Look at my daughter-in-law: half a chicken every day, cleaned to the bone. The more she eats, the more breast milk she has. You have no milk because your body was seriously depleted before!”
Since the hospital had formula, a free thirty-milliliter serving of cow’s milk could be collected at set times each day. Mothers whose milk had come in naturally breastfed, while those who hadn’t had their accompanying family members fetch the cow’s milk for the newborns.
It so happened that the new mother in the neighboring bed had an oversupply of milk. Her own newborn could barely finish a feeding, and her milk soaked through her clothes. If she didn’t express it in time, her breasts would harden, develop lumps, become inflamed, and cause her unbearable pain.
So, for the past few days, the Zhao Family’s Eldest Grandson had been getting his meals by nursing from the woman in the next bed, and she was happy to let him.
Every day, while holding her grandson to nurse from the neighboring woman, Mother Zhao would curse Xu Huiqing at the baby, “It’s all because your mother is useless. She eats an old hen every day and still has not a drop of milk. What good is a mother like that?”
Patients were discharged daily, and new ones admitted daily. Some stayed for several days, just like Xu Huiqing.
Some of them didn’t know what Xu Huiqing had been through before, but those who knew couldn’t help but speak to Mother Zhao, “Isn’t it because you provoked your daughter-in-law into a major hemorrhage! She lost so much blood she nearly died. Doesn’t she need to replenish that first? A baby’s milk comes from the mother’s lifeblood. Your daughter-in-law’s blood was drained; where is the milk supposed to come from?”
The woman in the neighboring bed recovered quickly and left the hospital after three days. Her mother-in-law still came to the hospital at the same times daily to deliver chicken soup. Xu Huiqing would eat it, and she would take the empty pot back home.
Xu Huiqing had no milk, so the Zhao Family’s Eldest Grandson continued to nurse from other new mothers.
All this time since the birth, Xu Huiqing had not looked her son in the eye even once. Her heart and mind were filled entirely with Xiaoxi. All she wanted was to recover quickly and bring Xiaoxi back.
As for the newborn Zhao Bei, even though he was just a tiny baby who understood nothing, she found it difficult to feel motherly love for him anymore. The moment Mother Zhao brought him over to suckle, her mind would echo with the words he had coldly used to accuse her after her daughter jumped—eyes devoid of any sadness for his sister, devoid of any condemnation for his father’s infidelity, only understanding and acceptance of it.
“You drove our sister to jump! If you weren’t so controlling, how could she have run so far away to college in the Capital City? If she wasn’t that far, how could she have been manipulated into suicide? You caused her death!”
“Why doesn’t her suicide note mention me, or Dad? She only mentioned you! Isn’t that your fault? You had to control which university she attended, which major she chose, even her boyfriend! You meddle too much, you know that?”
“I’ve never heard of a mother who forbids her daughter from marrying far away and demands she settle in Jiangsu-Zhejiang-Shanghai. Why don’t you just tie her to your side? You drove our sister to her death, did you know that?”
You drove our sister to her death!
You drove our sister to her death! Did you know that?
Did you know that?
Did you know that?
Did you know that?
For a moment, her son’s words echoed in her mind in a three-dimensional, cyclical loop like a devil’s curse, like a devil’s language consuming her, making her ceaselessly doubt herself. Was it really her fault? Had she pushed her daughter to jump because she intervened too much?
Yes, it was her!
She hadn’t protected her daughter well, allowing her to be sold as a child and suffer so much!
She was so terrified her daughter would be trafficked again that she wanted to keep her under her watch every moment of the day, fearing the girl would vanish the moment she looked away!
She had always wished her daughter wouldn’t stray too far from home, hoping she’d attend a university in Jiangsu-Zhejiang-Shanghai and settle there, staying close so she could protect her. That way, if she married far away and was bullied, her mother would know and could stand up for her!
It was her!
It was her!
It was all her!
The whole world seemed to transform into a collection of razor-sharp blades, hacking away at her, cutting her soul, her flesh, and her blood into scattered, broken, and chaotic pieces.
She couldn’t close her eyes; closing them was pain, opening them was pain!
The pain made her break out in a cold sweat, tears streaming endlessly! The pain made her curl up her body, yet she found not the slightest relief.
“Oh dear, girl, what’s wrong with you?”
It was another patient’s family member in the ward who first noticed Xu Huiqing’s abnormal state and hurried to call the doctor.
Seeing her daughter-in-law have another episode, Mother Zhao quickly carried her precious grandson far away, fearing she might hurt him.
Another frantic rush of emergency treatment ensued, but Xu Huiqing was as if trapped by a nightmare, unable to wake on her own. The cursed words echoed in a full surround sound in her mind, and before her eyes was only a blood-red haze.
A young nurse ran out from the resuscitation room and asked, “Xiaoxi! Who is Xiaoxi? The patient has been calling for ‘Xiaoxi’ in her coma!”
An old woman in the ward, watching the commotion, heard the nurse’s question and quickly said, “I know! Xiaoxi is her eldest daughter! It seems her in-laws gave away her eldest daughter so she would birth a grandson!”
Some earlier patients in the ward had been discharged and new ones admitted. Many of these new patients and their families didn’t know the Zhao family’s story, but after being informed by the patients and families who had been there longer, they all learned about the Zhao family’s deeds.
Xu Huiqing’s body and soul seemed to be splitting apart. While her body suffered immense agony, the logic in her soul understood clearly that she had to wake up. She had to wake up. She had to protect her body, to have the strength to reclaim her child. She needed a healthy body to protect herself and her children.
At some point, her soul and flesh seemed to merge back into one. She became even more desperate to control her body, to control her emotions. Through the combined efforts of her and the doctors, her physical symptoms were once again alleviated in time. She was ‘saved’ back.
Originally, Xu Huiqing was supposed to be discharged after about ten days in the hospital. Because of this ‘episode,’ the doctors didn’t dare let her leave so soon and kept her for several more days of observation, where any issue could be treated immediately.
Especially regarding Xu Huiqing’s condition—whether it was postpartum eclampsia, yet unlike eclampsia, or not eclampsia, but with seizure-like symptoms. For now, they could only temporarily treat her as if it were eclampsia while recording her symptoms at the hospital. The doctors also feared it might be an undiagnosed illness and, fearing complications, decided to keep her for further observation.
Because of this loss of control, Xu Huiqing, who originally would have gone home after ten days, ended up staying an extra three days in the hospital, totaling half a month. She also ate old hens for nearly half a month, and her previously pale face finally regained some color from the nourishment.
Throughout that half month, Xu Huiqing had no breast milk and was unwilling to even hold the newborn. Whenever Mother Zhao brought him over to nurse, Xu Huiqing always had an excuse ready: “I’m still on medication. I don’t want to pass the effects through the milk to Little Treasure.”
Mother Zhao thought that made sense. With so many other new mothers in the ward, there was always someone to help out. It was just that Xu Huiqing’s persistent lack of milk greatly dissatisfied her. Looking at the confinement meal of chicken noodle soup brought by the childbirth companion lady, she couldn’t help but mutter, “Not even a drop of milk, what’s the use of eating chicken every day? When I was young, I barely had anything to eat, and my milk still dripped profusely…”
Unconsciously, she started loudly recounting her own pregnancy story again, always contrasting it with Xu Huiqing’s situation—how poorly she had eaten when she was young, yet still had so much milk—to emphasize how useless Xu Huiqing was.
Xu Huiqing focused only on recuperating and ignored her completely.
Zhao Zongbao was in the Neighboring City, so lost in pleasure that he forgot about home.
He’d visited Neighboring City with friends before, usually only staying two or three nights, but this was the first time he’d lingered for half a month. The city’s dazzling nightlife, the dance halls, the roller skating rinks—he was utterly captivated, lost in pleasure with no desire to return. He simply couldn’t remember that in the hospital lay his newborn son and the wife who had just given birth to him.
Yet he also needed to maintain his image as a good husband. So, every couple of days, he’d show up at the hospital, which coincided perfectly when he needed to rest after tiring himself out. Once there, he’d sprawl out on the long bench in the hallway where newborns were placed for jaundice treatment, and fall into a deep sleep.
The woman whose daughter-in-law had been discharged, the companion who brought Xu Huiqing her confinement meals, came to deliver an old hen. Mother Zhao saw her and immediately tried to snatch it away to give to Zhao Zongbao. But how could the child companion lady indulge her? She was a worker at the Neighboring City Textile Factory, tall and solidly built—far from someone Mother Zhao’s frail frame could overpower.
Having failed to grab it from the woman, Mother Zhao went to Xu Huiqing’s table to take it. While trying to take it, she reasoned with emotion, “Huiqing, look, you’ve been eating old hen for days now, your body has almost recovered. Zongbao is out working every day, he’s exhausted. Eat a few bites less of this chicken, let Zongbao have some to replenish his strength.” She looked pityingly at Zhao Zongbao’s face, slightly haggard from staying up late dancing at the dance hall. “Look at Zongbao, he’s lost weight from days of taking care of you.”
The ever-virtuous and obedient Xu Huiqing of the past did not listen to Mother Zhao this time. She gripped her bowl tightly, refusing to let go. She raised her head, looking at Mother Zhao with utter disbelief, and raised her voice, “You want to give my confinement meal to your son?”
Mother Zhao had initially been speaking quietly, but Xu Huiqing’s outburst immediately drew the attention of all the new mothers and their family members in the ward, who looked at Mother Zhao and Zhao Zongbao.
Zhao Zongbao remained asleep with his eyes closed, completely unresponsive.
Mother Zhao, afraid of waking her precious son, said urgently, “Why are you so greedy? What’s the use of all that chicken you’ve eaten? You still have no milk to this day. You’ve been eating chicken for so many days, what’s wrong with giving some to your man? He’s busy out there every day and still comes to the hospital to take care of you. Don’t you know how to feel for him?”
After over ten days of recovery, Xu Huiqing’s body had improved significantly; she was no longer as weak and feeble as when she’d just given birth. Yet she still pretended to be very frail, widening her eyes and asking Mother Zhao in astonishment, “Zongbao took care of me? He hasn’t been to the hospital these days. How has he taken care of me?”
Frustrated, Mother Zhao pointed at Zhao Zongbao, who was sound asleep on the long bench meant for newborns’ jaundice treatment in the hallway. “What do you mean Zongbao hasn’t been here? Isn’t he right there!”
Xu Huiqing cast a deep glance at Zhao Zongbao lying in the hallway, pretending as if he knew nothing. A look of sudden realization dawned on her face. “Oh~, so Zongbao was taking care of me in his dreams!”