Chapter 40
It was a lie. That was a lie!
I wasn’t saying this because I was blinded by jealousy. I could tell just by looking at the young master’s expression. His forced, indifferent smile was proof.
His smiles could be categorized into three types: a genuine smile of enjoyment, a forced social smile, and the grim reaper smile he wore right before scolding me.
His current smile was the second type. Slightly furrowed brows, twitching lips, and quickly cooling eyes. If they were truly discussing marriage, shouldn’t there be some excitement and nervousness?
He looked like he wanted to escape this situation immediately, and Miss Baba was trying to suppress her laughter, as if she found this amusing.
“Um, Young Master, are you being threatened?”
I asked cautiously. His expression twisted for a moment before returning to its usual placid state.
“Estella, come here.”
“Why, why? Is this a hostage exchange? Am I becoming a hostage in your place…? Fine. It’s my first time being a hostage, but I’ll try my best.”
I could see him gritting his teeth. If I were a dog, I would have tucked my tail between my legs and run away from that menacing glare.
“I said, come here and get away from him.”
Come to think of it, Castor was still holding my wrist. Realizing this belatedly, he quickly let go, startled.
“Ah!”
“You can’t just grab a lady’s wrist. It’s uncivilized. You could be ostracized from society and then beheaded in the public square.”
It was a bit of an exaggeration, but a harsh lesson was necessary for Castor. I pulled up my sleeve and checked my wrist. It was perfectly fine.
“If I were a normal lady, not a doll, my wrist would be bruised.”
“I’m sorry.”
Castor apologized readily. He then cautiously reached out his hand. I placed my hand in his and decided to explain this wondrous body of mine.
“See? Smooth and flawless. No pores either, because I’m not human.”
“Yes, I can definitely tell you’re not human. I can sense life energy, but it’s strange. I was actually suspicious. Wondering about your true nature…”
“I’m a very beautiful maid doll. Born to love the young master.”
“A doll…”
Castor murmured, tilting his head as if to examine my hand more closely. His eyes shone brightly between his long eyelashes.
I had a feeling Castor wasn’t entirely human either…
“Estella!”
I snapped out of my thoughts, startled by the roar-like voice. The young master had taken a step closer.
“Yes! You called!”
He smiled. Ah, this was the third type of smile. The expression he wore right before scolding me…
“Come here, now!”
“Yes!”
I pulled away from Castor and rushed to the young master. Just as I reached him, he grabbed my waist and lifted me up. He placed me beside the desk as if I were a potted plant. His chest blocked my view of Miss Baba and Castor.
“Young Master, could you move a little? You’re blocking my view.”
I politely placed my hands on his shoulders and tried to push him aside slightly. But he didn’t budge and glared down at me menacingly, as if I had done something wrong. I swear I did nothing wrong.
“Where were you?”
“I was in Miss Baba’s study, looking for a letter or something to prove her identity. I think it’s safe to give her the zombie core.”
“Besides that. What did you do during the rest of the time?”
“I went upstairs to the library.”
“With whom?”
“With him…”
I tried to point at Castor, but since the young master was blocking my view, I ended up pointing at him instead. But our intelligent young master understood immediately.
“You went to the library with that dragon brat.”
“Yes!”
He blinked a few times. He seemed displeased, but I wasn’t sure why. Was it because of the marriage discussion from earlier?
“Is it because of the… romance issue…?”
I wasn’t sure what he was angry about. But it seemed related, as his expression darkened even further. It felt like I was accurately pinpointing the destination, but in a very wrong way.
“Romance?”
He asked. I hesitated and nodded. Various scenarios flashed through my mind.
Hypothesis one: Miss Baba had threatened the young master into marrying her.
That didn’t make sense. Miss Baba had a strange way of thinking and kept proposing to me. Perhaps she was trying to get to the young master through me. Or maybe she tried to win me over to get to him, but when that didn’t work, she decided to take a direct approach…!
“I don’t know!”
Meanwhile, the young master was adjusting my clothes. Like a child playing with a doll, he meticulously fixed every little detail that others might overlook. My messy hair, the crooked shoulder seam of my dress, even the wrinkles on my sleeves.
As I let him fuss over me, I felt like a toy in a dollhouse. He was fiddling with me, his back turned to Miss Baba, a deep frown on his face.
“Is this a jealousy tactic?”
Was he trying to attract Miss Baba’s attention by acting close to me?
“That won’t work!”
There was no way that would work on Miss Baba! She was… well, frankly speaking, she was strange!
“It would be better to be affectionate.”
I pleaded sincerely. Wasn’t Miss Baba an unpredictable woman, like a bouncy ball? It would be better to take a direct approach.
“Why don’t you understand that being affectionate is more effective?”
His hand stopped moving.
“Affectionate?”
“Yes, affectionate. With love.”
He took both my hands in his and smiled. The kind of smile he wore right before getting angry.
“How can I be more affectionate? Was the dragon brat affectionate?”
“…He was better than you.”
Thinking about how the young master had treated Miss Baba so far… he had been arrogant and rude. If I were Miss Baba, I would have already found another potential groom.
“Estella, don’t test my patience. I’m not a nice master. Tell me the truth, or you’ll be punished.”
“P-punished?”
The last punishment I received before I died was writing lines fifty times. Please, no, punishments are so boring, please spare me. I didn’t even know what I did wrong.
“What did you do with him?”
“I…”
I couldn’t bring myself to tell the truth.
I went to find a book with secrets to seduce you! He’s obsessed with seducing Miss Baba!
I couldn’t say it. Absolutely not.
“Estella. Tell me now.”
He pressed me, his voice stern.
I was looking for a book with secrets to seduce you, and we decided to start by holding hands!
“Well…”
I hesitated and averted my gaze. Even I had some shame. I couldn’t tell him such a ridiculous truth in this atmosphere. In the end, I could only offer a vague truth.
“I did something… embarrassing…”
“What?”
Before he could question me further, I quickly slipped away.
“Don’t ask!”
“Estella!”
“I-I-I’m going through puberty!”
I had originally meant to say “private life.” Well, we both started with “pri,” so he would probably understand.
Leaving behind our conversation that resembled a quarrel between a father and daughter, I ran away. I was incredibly embarrassed.
To run away because I was afraid of being scolded… I had never been so ashamed. I should have been brave. But embarrassment was embarrassment.
Even I didn’t want him to know that I was scheming behind his back to seduce him!
I ran all the way to the forest. My doll body didn’t get tired or injured. I felt like I could run to the ends of the earth. No, I wanted to run to the ends of the earth.
“I’m so embarrassed!”
My cry echoed through the forest. Caw! Caw! Ravens mocked me as they flew away in flocks.
“Is it a crime to love someone?! When I was human, I couldn’t pursue love because of my low status! Now that I’m a doll, I can’t pursue love because I’m a doll! I want to be a princess! I want to propose confidently! I’ll die again, so please reincarnate me as a princess within ten years!”
Waaaaah! I don’t even have tear ducts to cry! This is so frustrating!
I ran until I lost track of time. Then, my foot caught on a rock. Would I have looked pitiful if I had tripped and fallen? But I was more durable than a rock. With a strange cracking sound, the ground beneath the rock split open.
I stopped and took off my shoe. Thankfully, my foot wasn’t damaged.
“Oh man, that scared me. I would have needed repairs if it was cracked.”
I put my shoe back on and looked back. The path I had taken was a trail of destruction, trees and grass torn apart as if a herd of wild boars had rampaged through.
“Did I run too hard…?”
I wondered what the young master was doing. Was he looking for me? Would he scold me for creating a highway in the forest? Or was he spending quality time with Miss Baba?
I wanted him to get married, but I didn’t want him to get married. My desires were complex and childish, sometimes even I couldn’t understand them.
“I’m too embarrassed to go back.”
I sighed and ran my hand through my messy hair.
“I wish some zombies would appear. I would capture them all and get praised. Then the young master would probably forgive me.”
As if the heavens had heard my wish, I heard strange noises in the distance. It sounded like a wild boar dance party.
“Help! Somebody!”
I heard a human voice amidst the chaotic noises.
“Zombies!”
I quietly clasped my hands together and closed my eyes.
Thank you, God.