Episode 1
Platinum blonde, neatly trimmed short hair.
Clear skin that never tans, despite rolling around in the scorching sun every day.
Distinct features and a slim physique.
But contrasting that slimness, possessing a surprisingly strong martial prowess.
A man who would become the continent’s hero…a man anyone would inevitably fall for.
“Master!”
They say even women passing by on the street would clutch their hearts and collapse at the sight of that smile, with those large, puppy-like eyes half-closed.
But that kind of thing doesn’t apply to me.
“What.”
Why, you ask?
Because obviously, I’m a ma..
“Y-You are…beautiful…today as well.”
“Pfft-!”
Fuck!
“Are you alright?!”
The water I had been holding in my mouth sprays everywhere.
It gets all over my bothersome long hair and this annoyingly flowing dress, making me irritated to no end.
Yes, I’m a man. No, I was a man.
A healthy 27-year-old man living in South Korea!
An ordinary man who loved games and fantasy novels, spending his days rolling around in bed!
But if you ask why I’m wearing a dress with long hair, it’s because of that, that thing.
I reincarnated, and I became a woman.
“May I…wipe it for you?”
No matter how much I’ve been reborn as a woman, how could I possibly like this dick-equipped bastard blushing and approaching me?
That dick, I used to have one too, dammit-!
“Fuck! Get the hell out of here! Didn’t I tell you not to say that shit, you son of a bitch?!”
“Even your harsh words are lovely.”
This consistently annoying bastard is none other than the damn protagonist who will become the hero who saves the world, and the guy who possesses the status window I’ve always wanted.
No, fuck!
It’s not just this guy, but apparently, any special bastard has a status window.
But they’re all idiots who can’t use it properly.
Hey, but if I’m a reincarnator, doesn’t that make me super special too?
I think I’m the most special one here, so why don’t I have a status window?!
I’m the only one without a status window, damn it!
“Master, are you busy today as well?”
“Yeah, I’m fucking busy.”
And because I taught this guy how to use the status window when he was young, the name I’m being called is-
“Great Sage, are you there?”
Great Sage.
In a world where all a woman can do is meet a good man, get married, and live happily ever after, I’m called the Great Sage just for teaching someone how to use a status window.
No, it’s truly absurd, but the Great Sage you guys adore is a fucking nobody without a status window and can’t do anything, you idiots!
Me, Kim Han.
A healthy 27-year-old man from South Korea.
“Mr. Han! Can you finish this by today?”
“It’ll be a bit difficult to finish by today.”
“No way! You have to meet the deadline, even if it means working overtime!”
“…Sigh, yes.”
After finishing the dreadful work at the company, I was on my way home, humming happily, thinking about grabbing a can of beer and reading a new web novel, when-
Screech-! Thud!
“Aaaaah! A person, a person..!”
I died, hit by a truck.
As my consciousness faded, only one thought kept swirling in my mind.
‘Wow- fuck, a reincarnation truck?’
And I really did reincarnate.
“Waaah-!”
As a 1-year-old baby who couldn’t even move properly.
No matter how much I tried to speak, all that came out was “waaah,” and my body felt so heavy and wouldn’t listen to me. It felt like it took five thousand hours just to look around.
But no matter how much I think about it, everything I see is unfamiliar yet familiar.
“Congratulations, Count.”
The title of Count, the clothes of the people in front of me, the decorations in the house…
Everything was telling me.
That this was the fantasy world I knew.
Wow, crazy. Crazy.
It really was a reincarnation truck, huh?
So, is it like that now?
Awakening something like a status window, fighting against evil, and eventually becoming a great hero, that kind of development!
“She’s a beautiful princess.”
“Count, please hold her quickly. She’s our daughter.”
I can hear voices, albeit faintly.
Perhaps, befitting a reincarnator, I’m equipped with a basic language pack or something.
They’re clearly speaking in a strange foreign language, but the meaning is automatically translated and enters my ears.
Damn, this is awesome.
This is what you call a reincarnation perk..!
Wait, hold on a second.
Didn’t they just say daughter..?
“Ah, she’s so lovely, just like you. You’ve worked hard, Jane.”
“Please name the child first, Count.”
It can’t be, haha.
A daughter?
What kind of preposterous thing is that?
I was just a man with a dick, dreaming of meeting a beautiful woman and getting married!
“Yuri. Let’s name her Yurius.”
“What a lovely name. My dear, isn’t it a lovely name that suits you perfectly?”
“Ooh-waaah-aah-!”
No, no!
Yuri!
I hate that name!
“Waaaaah-!”
“Oh my, it seems Yuri likes it too.”
With a face this crumpled, crying this sadly!
How can this be interpreted as a positive expression?!
No, more importantly, can’t I say anything other than “waaah”?!
“I love you, Yuri.”
“Our daughter, Mommy loves you very much.”
I’m not your daughter! Dammit!
No matter how hard I deny it, I can’t feel the thing that should be between my legs.
No, this can’t be.
This can’t be happening!
“Waaaaah-! Waaah! Waaaaah-!”
Annoyed by the loud babbling, I shut my mouth tight, and the surroundings become quiet.
Alright, let’s admit it.
No matter what I do, I can’t feel what should be between my legs, and everyone recognizes me as a daughter.
As a girl.
Yes, it’s really shitty, but I can’t change the gender that’s already been decided.
So let’s accept it.
Eventually, the memories of living as a man will fade, and then I’ll be able to get used to this life.
More importantly, I have something really crucial to do.
“Oh my, she suddenly became quiet.”
“I know, right? Is she sick or something?”
“The young lady is very healthy.”
I focus on my own task, ignoring whatever conversation the adults are having above my head.
“Ah-ae-aaah-!”
What is the physical structure of a baby like?
No matter what I do, it’s either “ah-” or “ae-” or “waaah.”
It means that no matter how hard I try to call out “status window,” it’s useless.
Well, even if a status window appeared from infancy, it wouldn’t be of any use.
When I can control my body freely and speak, then!
That’s the best time for it to appear.
Until then, all I can do is eat well, poop well, sleep well, and grow.
Ten years passed like that, and I turned 10.
Looking at the mirror in my room, I see a doll-like, lovely girl standing still, staring at her reflection.
“Ah- ah-“
Instead of fading, the memories of my past life became clearer, and as a result, I still can’t adapt to this body.
“Ugh..”
Long blonde hair tied in pigtails, big round eyes, and red lips.
Fair and smooth skin without a single blemish, as expected of a child.
Short, chubby arms and legs.
A cutely small height.
Anyone would think it’s lovely.
“I can think it’s lovely too..!”
Looking at a girl like this, I can think, “Ah, she’s so cute-“!
But why is this my appearance?!
No matter how lovely and cute it is, it’s a different story if it’s my own appearance.
I’m a man.
No matter how hard I try to shake it off, my identity is male!
I can’t get used to this girl’s body at all.
“You’ve turned the whole room upside down.”
At the sound of a playful, beautiful voice, my gaze, which had been fixed on the girl in the mirror, finally breaks away and turns elsewhere.
A graceful and elegant woman with long, straight blonde hair neatly tied back, just like the one I saw in the mirror.
This woman, with a beautiful face that makes it hard to believe she’s a mother, is my mother.
Jane de Elliot, that is.
“Mother, can’t I cut my hair short?”
“Oh my? Why the sudden interest in cutting your hair?”
I can’t say anything, so I just mumble.
Well, how can I say it?
The core inside your daughter is a man, and I hate this long, flowing hair and dress, so I’m going to live my life the way I want!
“Long hair is more lovely for a girl.”
Yes, I know.
I also had a time when my ideal type was a girl with long, straight black hair.
But that was just an ideal type, not an ideal!
“Yes..”
I can’t think of anything else to persuade her, so I just trail off.
“Come to think of it, our daughter seems to like things that boys do.”
“Is that so?”
“Yes, you’re always diligently practicing swordsmanship and basic physical training.”
That’s because I’m preparing for the day the status window appears.
It hasn’t shown itself yet, but for the day when it finally appears and shows my stats like strength and stamina!
How exhilarating would that be?
The moment I see all the results of my training in numerical form!
Damn, just thinking about it gives me chills.
“Now that I think about it, I’ll go train!”
“Don’t overdo it. You’ll get hurt.”
“It’s okay! No one will spar with me anyway.”
“Yuri..!”
Who in their right mind would let the only daughter of the Count get hurt?
They’d be fired immediately if she got even a little scratch.
Ignoring my beautiful mother’s shouts from behind, I dash off to the training grounds.
As I watch the knights practicing swordsmanship today as well, the Knight Commander, who’s the first to spot me, approaches with a welcoming expression.
But behind him, some hanger-on is following with a terrified look…
A boy?
“Young lady, you’ve come again today. It’s always nice to see you so cheerful.”
“Yeah, but what’s that?”
I point to the boy who looks about my age, clinging to the Knight Commander’s leg.
Well, of course, my real peers would be men around the Knight Commander’s age.
But, you know, formally speaking, I meant the kids my current body’s age.
“Ah, this is my son. He’s so timid, it worries me. Dustin! Greet the young lady.”
The Commander nudges him forward, and the boy finally bows his head and stands there awkwardly.
He’s a boy, for crying out loud.
Huh? If you’re born a man in a fantasy world, shouldn’t you be rolling around the training grounds, building up your strength?!
“Hmm, nice to meet you, Dustin. I’m Kim…no, Yuri.”
I reveal my unfamiliar name, but he still avoids eye contact and just stands there awkwardly.
“Would you perhaps be able to play with him, young lady?”
“Well, this timid type isn’t really my style, but I guess I have no choice.”
“Thank you, young lady. Will you be practicing swordsmanship today as well?”
“Yeah, I can’t slack off!”
“Haha, then we’ll be over there, so please call us if you need anything!”
A timid son from a Knight Commander with such a hearty personality.
Honestly, I was more of an outgoing type in my past life, so I find timid people incredibly frustrating.
“You said your name was Dustin? Do you know anything about swordsmanship?”
But if I push him too hard, this type will just clam up and make me even more frustrated.
So the answer is to approach him gently at first.
Besides, it’s a bit weird to say this since it’s my body now, but there’s no one in the world who wouldn’t be disarmed if a girl with this level of looks acted kindly towards them.
“Y-Yes, yes..! I just, just imitate what my father does..”
Platinum blonde, short, neat hair.
A gentle-looking boy with puppy-like eyes smiles innocently.
Well, kid.
You don’t seem like a bad guy.
“Alright, then let’s have a spar!”
“Y-You’ll get hurt in those clothes..!”
“It’s okay, it’s okay. Come on, come on.”
I lift a practice sword made for children, and for some reason, his big eyes widen even more.
“I-Isn’t it heavy..?”
“Huh? This is super light.”
I take out another sword and hand it to Dustin, but why is this boy so weak?
He can’t even hold a light practice sword made for children properly and starts to stumble.
“You need to eat more.”
“Y-Yes..?”
“Well, alright. Forget the sword. Tell me about yourself. I’ll listen specially.”
The practice sword made for children is the lightest sword here.
There’s no point in forcing him to hold it and watch him stumble, so I put the sword back in its place and plop down on the ground.
“Your clothes will get dirty, young lady..!”
“It’s okay, just come here and sit down, let’s talk.”
I pat the spot next to me, and he finally comes over and sits down.
“What, what should I tell you about?”
“Hmm, let’s see? About this world? Something like a status window or…”
“Huh?”
“Oh, uh, no. Pretend you didn’t hear that.”
I was so focused on the status window that I blurted it out without thinking.
I usually never make this kind of mistake with adults, but maybe it was because Dustin looked so harmless.
I made a mistake without even realizing it.
Ugh…
“Status window… Could it be that you can see it too, young lady?”
And at that moment, Dustin’s eyes changed.
“What..? You can see the status window?”
Of course, my eyes changed too.