Chapter 14: Cousin’s Unrequited Affection Ends in Utter Defeat
Fu Shaoyao had been pampered since childhood. This time, however, she had been locked in the ancestral hall for over ten days, eating only plain vegetables and tofu each day. A dedicated managing matron watched over her. She had to rise at the Mao hour, copy Buddhist scriptures all day, and could only stop at the You hour. It was an unspeakably bitter experience, and her face had turned sallow.
Now, seeing Fu Tangli’s indifference, Fu Shaoyao was both angry and resentful. She threw herself on the ground and began to wail, “Even if you disregard our sisterly bond, you should at least consider Father’s face! Sister, you pride yourself on your noble status now, but do you no longer care for your parents and relatives?”
Yang-shi didn’t dare to speak to Fu Tangli directly, so she turned to Fu Zhihe with tears in her eyes. “Although Queniang is not my biological daughter, I have treated her the same as Yanniang, never saying a harsh word to her. Heaven is my witness, where have I not done well enough? The two of them are blood sisters, they should love and support each other. How did it come to this? How can I, as their mother, bear it?”
Fu Tangli had previously promised to plead with their grandfather. Fu Zhihe had boasted about it to Yang-shi and Fu Shaoyao. But what happened? Fu Tangli had turned around and run off to Mount Qinghua, and had been gone for over ten days, causing Fu Zhihe to lose face completely.
Now that the matter was brought up again, even the good-tempered Fu Zhihe couldn’t help but feel a surge of anger. “Queniang, let me ask you, in front of your mother today, tell me, what will it take for you to let Yanniang go?”
Fu Tangli said calmly, “I don’t understand. It was clearly Yanniang who did wrong, so why are you all blaming me? Grandfather’s rewards and punishments are just. He has his reasons for doing this. If I were to plead for her, wouldn’t I be betraying his good intentions? Father knows how strict Grandfather is, yet you insist on making me face this misfortune. It truly puts me in a difficult position.”
Her face was gentle, but her nature was most stubborn. Even her grandmother had once laughingly scolded her, “Such a fine young lady, yet your temper is like a donkey’s. Neither your mother nor that good-for-nothing father of yours is like this. Who on earth did you take after?”
Her uncle had been present that day and, to make conversation with his mother-in-law, had chimed in, “Isn’t Lihua’s temper just like yours, Mother?”
This had made her grandmother laugh heartily.
Now, this donkey’s stubbornness had flared up. Facing Fu Zhihe, she showed no intention of yielding and said slowly, “I cannot do it. I ask for Father’s forgiveness.”
“You, you…” Fu Zhihe was furious. He pointed at Fu Tangli, his hand trembling. But Fu Tangli was the future Crown Princess, and she had Fu Fangxu to back her up at home. Fu Zhihe was weak; he didn’t dare to scold her, nor did he dare to hit her. After “you”-ing for a long time, he finally restrained himself, turned to Han-shi’s memorial tablet, and almost choked on his words.
“My lady, look at this! This evil creature was born to be the bane of her mother, causing you to lose your life. She should be filled with guilt and atone doubly for her sins. Now, she prides herself on having climbed a high branch and is disrespectful and disobedient to her parents. Isn’t it disheartening? It was a moment of folly on my part that I saved her and abandoned you. I have wronged you. It was not worth it, truly not worth it!”
Fu Tangli took a deep breath, her lips pressed so tightly they turned pale.
Seeing that her plea was hopeless, Fu Shaoyao cried even more miserably. “Our family was living perfectly fine. Who is she, and why did she have to come back? I know Father and Mother dote on me, and she is narrow-minded and can’t bear to see me well. Forget it, don’t beg her anymore. I can’t bear to see you suffer for my sake. If she wants to harm me, let her. I’m not afraid of anything.”
Yang-shi shed tears and hugged Fu Shaoyao, calling her “my precious darling” and stroking her repeatedly. “My poor child, what did you do wrong to suffer such hardship? Mother wishes she could bear it for you.”
Fu Zhihe was greatly moved. He went forward and, with one hand on each, supported Yang-shi and Fu Shaoyao, saying guiltily, “It is my incompetence that I cannot protect Yanniang. I have failed both of you, mother and daughter.”
The servants in the hall dared not speak, their eyes on their noses, their noses on their hearts, each pretending to be a clay statue.
Fu Tangli silently watched the family of three huddled together. She had intended to argue a few more words with Fu Zhihe, but suddenly she felt a wave of weariness and no longer wished to speak.
Incense was burning on the sandalwood table, and paper money was burning in the bronze basin. The white smoke drifted up, stinging one’s eyes. The person was gone, leaving only an old wooden tablet and a line of cold words.
Fu Tangli bowed deeply to her deceased mother’s memorial tablet, then turned and walked out.
***
Fu Fangxu and Han Zichen were in the study, drinking tea and talking.
Han Zichen was skilled in both literary and martial arts. He could discuss the art of war on the battlefield with Fu Fangxu, and also chat about the policy questions of this year’s spring civil service examination. Every word he spoke was substantive and insightful, earning frequent nods from Fu Fangxu.
As the Minister of State, Fu Fangxu usually carried a deep official authority. But at this moment, he was amiable toward Han Zichen, discussing the current state of the court with him, speaking frankly and earnestly.
The two found more and more common ground, feeling as if they had met too late.
Fu Fangxu sighed, “It is a pity that among my many sons and grandsons, not one can compare to Zichen. How fortunate the Earl of Xining is.”
“Old Master, why belittle yourself?” Han Zichen’s eyes glinted as he smiled. “With my cousin in the Fu family, isn’t that a hundred times better than Zichen?”
Fu Fangxu patted Han Zichen’s shoulder, his words holding a deeper meaning. “Queniang is young and inexperienced. In the future, she will need Zichen’s support.”
Han Zichen replied, “We are cousins. It is only right.”
As they were speaking, Fu Tangli came in to pay her respects to her grandfather.
Fu Fangxu was particularly kind today. He personally helped his granddaughter up and asked gently, “Queniang, why are your eyes a little red? Are you sad because of your mother’s death anniversary? You are truly a filial child.”
“Yes.” Fu Tangli lowered her head and respectfully reported to her grandfather, “These past few days, your granddaughter has been burning incense and praying at Yunlu Temple on Mount Qinghua. I have requested a Daoist Master from the temple to copy the Supreme Scripture for Salvation from Suffering forty-nine times for me. It was arranged that today, a sacrificial ceremony would be held to deliver my grandmother and mother from suffering. Now that the ceremony at home is finished, your granddaughter plans to set off for the mountain immediately. I have come to inform you, Grandfather.”
Fu Fangxu’s brows furrowed slightly. “If you wish to pray for your ancestors, you can just go to Yuanzhen Palace in the city. Grandfather has some face there and can ask the Perfected One Qingyang to chant scriptures for you. It is snowing today, and the weather is cold. Why go to that unknown, desolate mountain temple?”
Han Zichen said gently, “Although today is my aunt’s death anniversary, it is also my cousin’s birthday. Grandmother used to say, ‘The dead cannot be reached, but the living can still be hoped for.’ She told my cousin not to be blindly filial. I plan to follow Grandmother’s old custom and hold a birthday banquet for my cousin tonight at the Apricot Blossom Spring Rain Tower in the city. I will invite all the relatives and friends of the Fu family. I was just discussing this with the Old Master.”
Fu Tangli smiled faintly and said softly, “That may be so, but since I have been designated as the Crown Princess by His Majesty, my words and actions must be even more cautious. This dynasty governs the world with filial piety. How can I show a joyous demeanor today? I only wish to wear plain clothes and observe a fast for my ancestors. Furthermore, Yuanzhen Palace has a great number of worshippers and is still in the midst of the bustling world. It cannot show my sincerity. A deep mountain temple, isolated from the mortal world, with its humble rooms and simple fare, amidst the frost and heavy dew, only there can one find the true meaning of heaven and earth, and my prayers can reach the gods.”
Han Zichen sighed, “Cousin, you need not be so harsh on yourself.”
But Fu Fangxu laughed and said bluntly, “Queniang speaks with reason. His Majesty chose you as the Crown Princess because he values your upright character, which far surpasses others. Now that you have shown such filial piety, Grandfather will have someone publicize it for you, to enhance your good name. How wonderful.”
Since Fu Tangli had achieved her goal, she said no more, bowed, and slowly withdrew.
A wind had risen outside. The snow swirled in mid-air, drifting down, like a sobbing sound that vanished when one tried to listen closely.
Yanzhi was waiting outside the study. She draped a lotus-gray Kesi silk and silver fox fur cloak over Fu Tangli and held up an umbrella.
They had only taken a few steps when they heard Han Zichen’s voice from behind. “Cousin, please wait.”
Fu Tangli pretended not to hear, not pausing her steps for a moment, and continued to walk at an unhurried pace.
Yanzhi, however, hesitated for a moment.
Han Zichen took a few steps forward, took the umbrella from Yanzhi’s hand, and held it steadily over Fu Tangli.
“Lihua, this fox fur cloak was given to you by Grandmother a few years ago. It’s too short and too old now. You should get a new one.”
Fu Tangli said nonchalantly, “I have a strange habit. I only like old things.”
Han Zichen called out in a low voice, “Lihua…”
“Do not call me Lihua anymore,” Fu Tangli interrupted him. “That was a childhood pet name, not suitable for others to hear. You and I are both grown now, no longer young and innocent. Elder Cousin should be more formal.”
Han Zichen’s smile faded. He looked deeply at Fu Tangli. “Are you blaming me? Blaming me for rejecting Grandmother’s proposal back then?”
Fu Tangli stopped and turned, glancing at Han Zichen from the side. She couldn’t help but smile. “I’m blaming you? Elder Cousin, do you want to hear what foolish things you are saying?”
Who said she was proper and quiet? That one glance was like the reflection of a startled swan, surpassing all the spring light in the world, dazzling.
Han Zichen had not been without regret, especially at this moment. But he could only suppress it and say in a low voice, “You have always been a reasonable person. You should be able to understand me. My hands were tied. I only hope you will not hold a grudge because of this and harm the bond between us as cousins.”
The corner of Fu Tangli’s mouth twitched again and again. She almost lost control. She took a deep breath and beckoned to Yanzhi, who was standing in the distance.
“What are My Lady’s orders?” Yanzhi asked eagerly.
“Go find a mirror for the Young Master Cousin,” Fu Tangli said with a solemn expression, her voice calm. “Tell him to take a good look at himself in the mirror and see his own face clearly, and not to speak such absurd words.”
Yanzhi was a little dumbfounded and looked around, at a loss.
Han Zichen gave a bitter smile. “Lihua is still so mischievous.”
Fu Tangli had no desire to continue this entanglement. She turned and walked away, sighing to herself, “Truly an unlucky year, to encounter only petty people. May the Celestial Worthy grant immeasurable blessings. I must hurry to the temple and burn a few sticks of incense, to pray for the protection of the gods, that the plague gods may stay away and all evils be averted.”
Yanzhi hurried to follow.
Han Zichen stopped. He stood alone in the snow, holding the umbrella, watching Fu Tangli’s receding back. His face was expressionless, his gaze ice-cold, without a trace of the warm gentleman he had been moments before.